M.E. Thomas: No. I would say the, the closest I've come, the longest it lasted was eight months, and I almost think that was due in large part to the guy being, he had, he had his own sort of issues about feeling that he sort of didn't try hard enough in relationships. So it was almost like a game of relationship chicken with us. Where I was like I'm not going to be the one who ends this relationship, and he was also, he wouldn't be the one to end the relationship. Which is good for relationships, you know that's one of the reasons that people get married, is to further commit to people, and stuff.
But that, that was kind of a unique situation. And I think all of my relationships, the, being around the person constantly is, is difficult. You know even that relationship, we probably saw each other like four to six hours a week. Which is that a lot of time? It kind of seems like that's not that much time to be around somebody, that you're in a, you're in a relationship with.
Rob Kall: I don't think so. No. So have you learned anything from this journey you've been on writing this memoir that you think might help you with getting into a loving and romantic relationship?
M.E. Thomas: You know I think, I have learned a lot from writing the memoir. Specifically about relationships I think that the thing that I sort of had hoped, even a subconscious hope without really being able to voice it, was that as I embraced these things about myself, and as I disclosed these things, am more open about these things with other people, that I can start being more an authentic person. My authentic self.
And I won't feel like I have to put on a mask. And so I won't feel like I have to limit my interactions with people to, you know, four to six hours. Like when I'm around my family, my family knows exactly who I am, and everything, and I feel completely comfortable, there's no number of hours that's too many hours being around my family. But if I feel like I'm putting on a show, it gets to be exhausting, you know, and it gets to be uninteresting to me. Why put on a show in front of this other person? There's not this sense of intimacy.
My sister actually, recently called me, and she's a sister that is very emotional. The most emotional one in the family. She's a little bit like a changeling that way. And we never really have had that much in common. And so we don't call each other, we probably call each other maybe once a year. But she called and said, you know, "I started reading your book, and I just want you to know that I love you and I respect you". And it was very interesting because, my sister wasn't just saying she, you know I love you and respect you and you're my sister. She was saying I have read these things about you in the book, and I love you and respect you.
And that meant a lot more to me than, any other time that she's ever said she loves me. Because whenever she used to say I love you, I always thought you don't know me any better. You know, you don't really know what you're saying when you say you love me.
Rob Kall: *chuckles*
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