Article: Baptism by Bullets

Chuck McAlister, a self-described master storyteller and former Outdoor Channel hunting show host who presides at church gun giveaways as the Southern Baptist Convention
(Image by (Photo: Matt Stone, The Louisiville, Ky., Courier-Journal)) Details DMCA

Bible-thumpers and bullets, they go together like peanut butter and jelly. Like bread and butter. Like Republicans and corruption. A clever Kentucky Baptist church has found a way to gather lost little lambs with itchy trigger fingers -- by delivering them to Jesus on the barrel of a gun.

The Lone Oak Baptist Church in Paducah, Kentucky is passing out salvation with a side of Glock-9 to every new member that joins the church. Oh, they get a free steak, too. Not sure why. USA Today scored an interview with Kentucky Baptist Convention evangelical leader (and Outdoor Channel Master Storyteller) Chuck McAlister about the holy promotion:

"The goal is to 'point people to Christ,' the church says in a flier. Chuck McAlister, an ex-pastor, master storyteller and former Outdoor Channel hunting show host who presides at the events as the Kentucky Baptist Convention's team leader for evangelism, said 1,678 men made 'professions of faith' at about 50 such events last year, most in Kentucky.

"'The day of hanging a banner in front of your church and saying you're having a revival and expecting the community to show up is over,' said McAlister, who hosted the religious-themed 'Adventure Bound Outdoors' on the Outdoor Channel for 16 years. 'You have to know the hook that will attract people, and hunting is huge in Kentucky,' he said. 'So we get in there and burp and scratch and talk about the right to bear arms and that stuff.'

[...]

"'We have found that the number of unchurched men who will show up will be in direct proportion to the number of guns you give away,' McAlister said.

"He said that when he spoke at a church in Traverse City, Mich., in February 2013 that gave away 80 guns, 382 people made 'professions of faith.'

"McAlister said the giveaways have wide appeal. 'We get meat hunters who hunt just to put food on the table' along with 'executives who think nothing of paying $10,000 to hunt bear in Alaska,' he said. 'Guys all want to receive something for free.'"

I'm sure this is exactly the kind of outreach Jesus -- the Prince of Peace -- suggested to his disciples -- go ye forth and spread the gospel, show others that I am the Way and the Light, burp and scratch and shoot guns and kill animals and give away free steaks...

Amen.