Please be advised that this department's position on the protection of public-school students from aggressive behavior of others is informed by the leader of our country, President Donald J. Trump.
As I am sure you are aware the President has used many unflattering nicknames for individuals from all walks of life.
These include but are not limited to:
Little Marco, Crooked Hillary, Lyin' Ted, Rocket Man, Dumbo, Jeff Flakey, Lamb the Shamb, Fat Jerry, Cheatin' Obama, Dumb as a rock AOC, Dummy Beto, Truly weird Senator Rand Paul, Nervous Nancy, Mr. Peepers, Little Adam Schitt, Cryin' Chuck, Dumb Southerner, Pocahontas, Low-IQ Maxine Waters, Dopey Prince, Rocket Man, Crazy Jim Acosta, Sloppy Steve, Wacky Glenn Beck"
Yesterday, the President was exonerated on all charges leveled against him in the partisan impeachment hearings.
Additionally, the Senate has determined that any actions taken by the President that he believes are in the nation's best interest are totally within his discretion.
Since the President has found bullying to be a potent force in his success, we will certainly not countenance any sanctions on students patriotically exerting their constitutional right to bully thus currying favor with peers.
We suggest you take the following remedial actions:
 · Legally purchase a semi-automatic weapon
 · Enroll your child in a private school
 · Contact my Brother Erick Prince founder of Blackwater U.S.A.
 · Hire one of his contractors as a body guard for Travis
If you follow the above recommendations, we believe your son's problems will be alleviated and he will flourish and grow into a contributing member of American society.
Thank you for your time in reaching out to this office.
If you seek any further assistance kindly contact a private counselor as we can be of no further service.
Sincerely yours,
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