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Citizen Troublemaker: "Where's My Bonus?"

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Message Rafe Pilgrim

Daytimes, my friend Bob Citizen teaches youngsters Political Science, Ethics, and Hygiene. (He claims they're related, or should be.) At night he travels wherever he must to blow saxophone in jazz gigs, hoping to catch up with the balloon payments on his mortgage, which is threatened with foreclosure, as well as to keep his canine companion, Jefferson, in biscuit bones.

An irredeemable idealist, Bob got upset upon learning of the second round of bonuses to executives of AIG, and penned a brief letter to President Obama, in its entirety asking: "Where is MY bonus?"

The reply to his letter follows.

Dear Mr. Citizen,

President Obama -- currently tied up with the proposal for incentive bonuses to senators -- has forwarded your letter to me for reply.

Of course we (tee hee hee!) take your issue seriously. By the way, that's a neat name you got there, and I just love the pooch's name -- where did it come from?

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Rafe Pilgrim, after "a life largely wasted on hard honest work," found himself a jungle of turkey oak, scrub pine and giant palmettos up a dirt road running east of Crystal River, Florida, which neither school busses nor the U.S. Postal Service dare (more...)
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