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Life Arts    H4'ed 5/24/19

Before You Give Up on Dating -- Read This!

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This article first appeared in the Huffington Post


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Do you ever feel like throwing in the dating towel?

You've met enough jerks, insensitive guys, dull women or men, or total non-communicators. Perhaps it's individuals that are not supportive or with whom you share few common interests. Maybe there's absolutely no chemical attraction! You need this last one, I don't care what anyone says!

It might be your brain has been fried with mind numbing dates tolerable, but ultimately insufferable. Or the ones where the person is a complete pardon the expression, a**hole.

If you find yourself nodding your head, rest assured you are not alone. Dating is not easy when you're young and often, (not always) the older you get the more negative experiences you accumulate and the sense of futility grows and grows. At some point, you might be getting ready to call it a day and simply give up on the rat race of dating.

Wait! Stop! Halt! Don't abandon it all just yet. I make very few guarantees, but as they say in advertising "I can virtually guarantee" there is someone out there for you. Perhaps a diamond in the rough, an unexpected stranger, or dare I say it, your mother's friend's son (oy vey). It might even be an old pair of shoes that with a good spit polish will dance you off into the sunset.

I'm not making light of the frustrations of dating and finding the right person for the first, second, or third time. Believe me, I write from much experience, not just as a life coach, but as a Baby Boomer that grew up and burned out on singles dances, vowing never to return. This was before the digital age dawned offering all sorts of new opportunities.

My favorite ex met her husband of 11+ years and two children later, online. Some of the happiest marriages I know of started via the Internet. It really can work when the stars are aligned, you know what to look for and you put yourself in the right frame of mind. Positive!

That being said, I don't advocate a particular way to find dates simply that, whatever method you choose to make contact with the opposite sex the key is knowing yourself and then "to thine own self be true!"

Let's try a quick Mind Acrobaticsà "ž exercise. Although the instructions call for closing your eyes, feel free to keep them open" either way works!

Mind Acrobatics Exercise #1: "What the Heck Do I Really Want?"

Time needed: 10 or 15 minutes.
Materials: Paper, pen, great music, favorite beverage and positive outlook.
Location: Wherever you are most relaxed.

 · Play the music you associate with the happiest period in your life.

 · Take a sip of your drink. (click on page 2)

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David Kanegis is a Certified Professional Coach. He developed Mind Acrobatics(TM) a series of "self-empowerment" exercises and techniques designed to enable people to create and sustain life changes. Dave holds MA's in Psychology & (more...)
 

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