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Sci Tech    H4'ed 1/12/10

What Happened to Speling, Grammer and Geografie?

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I am also appalled by some parents - most of them educated - who have now dumbed down to their kids' level in a futile attempt, I suppose, to feel young and stupid again. I hear parents saying "anyways," or "he was like" instead of "he said," or "pitcher."

And forget about spelling. Spelling is now limited to spelling bees, where kids spell words that will never be used by anyone, except in spelling bees.

My kids' California high school was proclaimed a "Top 100 Distinguished School," no doubt by some illiterate who had to consult a dictionary six times to spell the word "distinguished." If that school was distinguished, I'm the Prince of Denmark.

And if itactually was a top 100 school, how come students with A's in AP World History class had no idea who Napoleon was? Maybe the teacher just had a beef about Napoleon and refused to acknowledge his existence. Fifty years from now will subsequent generations remember Alexander the Great? Hemingway? Brahms? George Patton? Chico Marx?

Presidents keep telling us about the need to improve science and math scores. Granted, those are both important subjects for our kids to master, but I shudder to think of future scientists who think that New Delhi is in Nebraska.

Frankly, I'm concerned about the fate of civilization. Language is important. It has taken centuries of gibberish for us to get here. Not speaking properly may cause us to devolve into Visigoths. From there, it's a hop, skip and a jump back to Neanderthal. Then, we'll all be livving in cav dwilings, although we won't know, where any of, them are actualie locayted!!!

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John Blumenthal has been a professional comedy writer for 25 years. A former associate editor and columnist at Playboy Magazine (following a short stint at Esquire), he's written 8 books and 2 produced movies. His films include "Short Time," (major (more...)
 
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