Send a Tweet
Most Popular Choices
Share on Facebook 1 Share on Twitter 2 Share on LinkedIn Share on Reddit Tell A Friend Printer Friendly Page Save As Favorite View Favorites
Exclusive to OpEdNews:
Sci Tech

Your Car Needs A Colonoscopy!

By       Message James and Jean Anton       (Page 1 of 2 pages)     Permalink    (# of views)   4 comments

Related Topic(s): , Add Tags
Add to My Group(s)

Well Said 1   Funny 1   Interesting 1  
View Ratings | Rate It

Author 56370
Become a Fan
  (3 fans)
- Advertisement -





- Advertisement -

Check Engine
(Image by Jim Anton)
  Permission   Details   DMCA
This probably has happened you.

- Advertisement -


You are driving somewhere when suddenly an icon of your engine turns bright yellow on your dashboard.   You don't know what it means.   But it looks serious, very serious.   That's an outline of your entire engine.   It's no t like you only need gas or something.   Cars need engines to function and they're expensive to replace.    You wonder if your car will explode, or start dropping parts all over the road.   

Fear and panic sets in.   Gotta get home before something really awful happens as you are doing seventy in the left lane of the freeway.  

You drive the car to your favorite service station, and the attendant tells you that he has to do some tests.   "Tests????"   You find that he has a computer that he attaches to something under the hood, and a tube he puts into the exhaust pipe.   Reminds you vaguely of a colonoscopy.   People who get colonoscopies are luckier.   They are offered drugs.   He shoves the tube up the exhaust, and runs the engine.   You wince.

"There's nothing wrong with the engine," he tells you.   "Your emissions are fine.   It's the sensor--the OBD II--that's broken."

Nothing wrong with the engine!   Oh, thank you, God!   It's over, you think.   You breathe easier.   You feel lucky.   Your car won't need a new engine.

- Advertisement -

But then the attendant says "You'd better have it taken care of."   He sounds serious so you ask:   "What will it cost?"

"About seven-hundred and fifty dollars," he says, trying to seem nonchalant.   Trying to make it seem like this is a wonderful way to spend your money.


"I know it's a lot of money," he says.   "But the part is very expensive.   And if you go to the dealer they are going to charge you twelve-hundred.   People are even stealing them from parked cars."

Next Page  1  |  2


- Advertisement -

Well Said 1   Funny 1   Interesting 1  
View Ratings | Rate It

James and Jean Anton were born and raised in New York City, and spent ten years living and working abroad in countries as diverse as Brazil, Ecuador, Denmark, Italy and Iran. They have written and illustrated books for Scholastic Inc, McGraw (more...)

Share on Google Plus Submit to Twitter Add this Page to Facebook! Share on LinkedIn Pin It! Add this Page to Fark! Submit to Reddit Submit to Stumble Upon Share Author on Social Media   Go To Commenting

The views expressed herein are the sole responsibility of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of this website or its editors.

Writers Guidelines

Contact AuthorContact Author Contact EditorContact Editor Author PageView Authors' Articles
Related Topic(s): , Add Tags

Most Popular Articles by this Author:     (View All Most Popular Articles by this Author)

Noam Chomsky Rains On Bernie's Parade

It's Time to Take Both Parties Down.

Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, Superman, and the American Way

The Energy of the Disenfranchised Majority

Monsanto Versus Democracy In Vermont

There Was No Election