And so, the stage set sort of, the Republicans will hold two conventions this summer. The business end will be in Charlotte while Jacksonville will host the Cheeto's "You don't look sick world tour 2020." Since the business end of the tour will be in Charlotte who exactly will be the audience in Jacksonville is uncertain. The orange one has a proven ability to draw a crowd especially if he keeps the ticket prices at everyday low, low free. Make your X by the line that says you won't sue and leave your Confederate flag in the pickup.
Stop me if you have heard this one before. The Cheeto is anxious to begin his rallies again, and the staff at the White House are also anxious to get the orange one out from underfoot. This is his forte his strong suite. Off the cuff ramblings with threats, dog whistles and enemies lists. But there is excrement in the punch bowl and feces in his Easter basket. Because of delusional order 13579 the Cheeto has declared the pandemic over and ordered everybody back to work, the Cheeto can't wear a mask. Since Memorial Day we have seen spikes of Covid 19 infections. The Cheeto will give a whole new meaning to the term farewell tour. Monkey see monkey do. The Cheeto won't wear a mask so his followers won't wear a mask either.
Despite lawsuits and threats of lawsuits, the Cheeto's poll numbers continue to slide. Even his base is saying to knock it off with the tweets. But he can't help himself he's anxious to get back out on the road to those hot crowded areas filled with excited white faces in the over sixty-five high risk groups. Rather than shooting one person on Fifth Ave. the Cheeto will try for a hat trick taking out bunches at a time. Typhoid Mary meet Covid Donny.
Come on honey, get in the Chevy. Good old boys are drinking whisky and rye and singing" this will be the day that I die. It is a first "The Kill Me Kill You" tour. But he really loves the roar of the greasepaint and the smell of the crowd. That last hurrah before the program goes into reruns and the Cheeto does love it so. And if he kills a few hundred people what of it? They were going to die someday anyway, and they did sign the release.
One of the most important things that every con man must know is when the jig is up. The Cheeto knows the walls are caving in and the poll numbers are disastrous. One more for the road! I'm ready for my close-up now Mr. Deville. The old orange war horse is on one final campaign. No temperature checks, no masks, no social distancing, no sh*t. Jesus will be busy all-day saving souls as the anti-science crowd fills the arena. They love me. They really do love me! But the Party loyalists will be missing. Himmler, Hess, Miller, and McConnell will take a powder and are probably discussing peace terms with the Swedish Ambassador. I seriously doubt the Trump family will show up for the show. You gain nothing and you risk everything.