"Madame Didier was a very attractive woman with two caveats as to her appearance -- her nostrils and the index finger and thumb of her right hand were stained the color of nicely worn and oiled saddle leather. Madame Didier was horribly addicted to tobacco snuff. Her snuff box was a Russian enameled, gilded and bejeweled thing, much coveted and talked about among her circle of friends and enemies, of which she had numerous; enemies.
On the day in question, when asked about "days in question" her husband, a fallen, alcoholic scholar and peer of the realm, replied, "There must be a myopic, phlegmatic little man somewhere around here that has eschewed family life, pleasant or otherwise, and builds his meagre fortune questioning days," on the day in question Madame Didier walked the few yards east from her house to the overheated and stale office of the local magistrate. They would meet on Wednesdays at lunchtime and know each other in the biblical sense in a small chamber of indeterminate purpose, which was also overheated, behind the Magistrate's office. The purpose of her regular visits were publically described as the friendly visiting of two friends that enjoyed good snuff. Her husband's card playing circle of friends regularly referred to the industry of the marital bed, etc. as "enjoying good snuff."
On the day in question, after the Magistrate and Madame Didier had "enjoyed good snuff," Madame Didier heard wild chattering coming from the ceiling of the Magistrates office. Lacing up her bodice, she walked into the office, looking up she spotted, sitting on the monumentally large egg and dart crown moulding, a monkey wielding a long, rustic kitchen knife. Running back into the chamber of their extra-marital industry she accosted the Magistrate, "My god, Philippe, there is a monkey in the room with a knife!.." From "Madame Didier's Snuff Box" By Franklin Cincinnatus
(Article changed on January 19, 2019 at 21:46)
(Article changed on January 20, 2019 at 16:19)