Send a Tweet
Most Popular Choices
Share on Facebook 11 Share on Twitter Printer Friendly Page More Sharing
Exclusive to OpEdNews:
Life Arts   

The Iranian Limpet Mine: the Scoop on the Lowdown on the Skinny

By       (Page 1 of 1 pages)     (# of views)   No comments
Author 70183
Follow Me on Twitter     Message Philip Kraske
Become a Fan
  (6 fans)

Video purports to show Iran removing ship mine The U.S. military on Friday released a video it said showed Iran's Revolutionary Guard removing an unexploded limpet mine from one of the oil tankers targeted ...
Video purports to show Iran removing ship mine The U.S. military on Friday released a video it said showed Iran's Revolutionary Guard removing an unexploded limpet mine from one of the oil tankers targeted ...
(Image by YouTube, Channel: Associated Press)
  Details   DMCA
- Advertisement -

The Pentagon recently presented fake news,
Regarding the doings of Iran Navy crews,
Who took down a wreath attached to a tanker,
Which in the Oman rode peaceful at anchor.
Yes, a "wreath," which is no B.S. from a ninny,
For here's the real scoop, the lowdown on the skinny.
.
You know how these sailors have a babe in all ports?
Well, in these times of e'galite' of all sorts,
Turns out Filipino met a Guard from Iran,
And they hit it off as two handsome guys can.
So the Fil docking Gulf-side, they set every sail,
And did what they did, not to enter detail.
.
But you know how things go: the Rev Guard got pissed,
When he found out he was one more on a list,
And sent the Filipin' a blistering Dear John,
This by text message into the ether and yon,
Picked off by those swift guys at our NSA,
Who laughed their ass off, saying "This makes our day!"
.
Yet love sprang anew when the Fil's ship returned,
And the Guard repented and for old love yearned,
So in dark of night he slipped out of the port,
And hung on the ship's side a wreath of love's sort,
Sending the Filipino a message anew:
"On that starboard side, babe, there's something for you."
.
By now the NSA guys were rolling on floor,
And someone called Centcom and said with a roar,
"Get eyes on that starboard and don't give me crap,
The brass wants to see it, so let's see it ASAP!"
'Round screens staff gathered as the chopper flew near,
"It's solid red roses!" and they toasted with beer.
.
Yelled and drank, that is, till in walked a three-star,
And asked impolitely why this seemed a bar,
But those techies were smooth as techies can be,
And quick blurred the big screen before telling he,
A limpet they'd found that had blown a mere poof.
"Look, they're removing it 'cause they know it's proof!"
.
Alas, port guards had seen the lover's return,
And in the brig thrown him for a seven-month burn,
And sent men to the symbol of roses to grab,
Do it damn fast before the gossips could gab,
So now we behold the good work that all did:
Iran kept its rep and the Yanks got their vid.

(Article changed on June 17, 2019 at 17:19)

 

- Advertisement -

Rate It | View Ratings

Philip Kraske Social Media Pages: Facebook Page       Twitter Page       Linkedin page url on login Profile not filled in       Instagram page url on login Profile not filled in

"11/9 and the Terrorist Who Loved Bonsai Trees" is Philip Kraske's just-published novel. It can be found at his website: www.philipkraske.com

Go To Commenting
The views expressed herein are the sole responsibility of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of this website or its editors.
Writers Guidelines
Contact AuthorContact Author Contact EditorContact Editor Author PageView Authors' Articles
Support OpEdNews

OpEdNews depends upon can't survive without your help.

If you value this article and the work of OpEdNews, please either Donate or Purchase a premium membership.

STAY IN THE KNOW
If you've enjoyed this, sign up for our daily or weekly newsletter to get lots of great progressive content.
Daily Weekly     OpEdNews Newsletter
Name
Email
   (Opens new browser window)
 

Most Popular Articles by this Author:     (View All Most Popular Articles by this Author)

9-11 was a national job

What if North Korea Turns off the Lights in America?

Republicans try to stop the Revolution of the Rubes

The touchy-feely propaganda of 60 Minutes

Russia and The New Rome

Syria and sarin: such is politics