The house was dark and silent and seemed as sleepy as me until I noticed a sort of gleam coming from my office. It appeared that my computer, Hunter, was out of his "sleep mode". As I looked into the office I saw that Scout (our Wirehaired Dachshund) was sitting at my computer.
Her butt was nestled in my chair with her long low body stretching out so that one paw leaned on the keyboard while the other paw was on the mouse. She was staring so intently at the screen, she didn't notice me. I strained to focus on the screen and realized she was on my Blog page, The Opinion Sector.
I crept in quietly, quite disquieted by the queer and quirky scene. (I alliterate when I get nervous). She softly blew some air out of her nose. She had found what she wanted. She appeared to be looking at some gift site's products and collections page.
She moved the cursor over the "See All" link and when the list came up she moved it quickly to the "Pet Accessories" link. The smile on her little wiener lips grew craftier. Without hesitation, her little paw left clicked the mouse. Her eyes grew larger underneath her bushy eyebrows.
She scanned the new page left to right and back again with real determination. Standing up in my desk chair she leaned forward as her eyes narrowed and squinted at the screen. Peering down, she moved the cursor to the scroll bar, right clicked and scrolled the page downward. It was quite obvious to me that she was looking for something in particular. She had the same determined look on her face that she'd get, just before she'd steal Papa Dog's treat.
She left clicked the mouse once and then again. A popup page appeared and she leaned closer to the screen. So close, her nose fogged the glass and her mustache and beard were silhouetted against the bright display.
She licked her lips like she does just before she bites me and she made a sound. A nasally sinister, expulsion of breath sort of like... "..eeh...eeh...eeh." It's kind of like the sound John McCain makes when he laughs. You know, like Burgess Meredith sounded when he laughed as the Joker on the original Batman TV series, "...eeh...eeh...eeh."
It's a really creepy sound and it was my cue to back out into the hall. I was a little shaky, not sure if I was dreaming this or not. Through it all I became aware of the reason I got out of bed in the first place. I continued on to the bathroom to complete my original mission.
On my way back I glanced nervously into the office but Scout was not there. Hunter was dark and my chair was back against the desk. When I got back to the bedroom, little Scout was lying in her bed as still as the night. Shaking my head I crawled back into bed right next to Kate, who mumbled in her sleep.
As I lay there I began to think that what I thought I'd seen was really just a dream. A byproduct of my nocturnal call of nature. After all, Scout is smart but she really couldn't manipulate my computer, could she? I know she can be a...devious little devil... but...she has...no opposable...thumbs....and it...seems...unlikely............
As my last thoughts turned to sleep, I thought I heard a quiet little yip. It could've been a yap. I wasn't sure at all as I strained to remember the next morning while I was having my coffee. I didn't say anything to Kate. I knew she would have told me I was crazy. Dogs...computers...sleep walking, that's what it was.
So I sat down at Hunter and gave his mouse a wiggle or two to wake him up. As the screen came to life, the first thing I saw was a popup page. It was from a gift site and showed a Pink Plush Pet Carrier picture with the text, What pretty pet wouldn't want to come along for the ride if they could travel in stylish comfort like this? I was, needless to say, speechless. My eyes read further, 19" x 6 1/2" x 10 1/2" high.
My brain was trying to calculate when my ears heard a soft but ominous, "...eeh...eeh...eeh." behind me. I slowly spun in my chair to find Scout standing in the door way. She had that strange smile on her little wiener lips. As I looked closer I noticed she had my handy, 4-in-1 Tape Measure (with built in calculator and notepad) lying at her feet. As I rose to begin measuring I heard a soft yip, it could've been a yap but it was so quiet I really couldn't tell....