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San Francisco based columnist, author, gym rat and novelist. My book, "The Confessions of a Catnip Junkie" is the best memoir ever written by a cat. Available on Amazon.com, or wherever fine literature is sold with no sales tax collected.
For those seeking more detail on yours truly, the following is from my website, allangoldstein.com, where you can partake copiously, and for free.
"Allan Goldstein lives in San Francisco with his wife, Jordan, and a minimum of two cats. His op-ed newspaper column,"Caught off Base," has appeared in San Francisco's West Portal Monthly for the past decade. Satire, invective and humor are specialties.
He also blogs regularly on opednews.com and on hypocrisy.com under the pseudonym Snark Twain. Other work has appeared in Spitball, The Baseball Literary Review, The Potomac Review, and several magazines including Rock and Gem and Pilot's Preflight. He is currently at work on his third novel."
Hollywood's Great Generation Gap Fail
Youth, they say, is misunderstood. What they don't say is that youth wants to be misunderstood. Being misunderstood provides an illusion of uniqueness. And it's hard to feel special when you Instagram your daily lunch.
Old people are less misunderstood, except by young writers who don't get them. So here are a few clues. Maybe they'll make my next movie going experience less annoying.
Wednesday, January 28, 2015(4 comments)
The Word War II Delusion
War is murder. Sometimes defensive war is necessary. But what gave us the crazy idea that war can have a happy outcome for everyone concerned? World War II.
Thursday, November 13, 2014(4 comments)
The Sissy Cynic's Guide to Ebola
The cure for Ebola is already here, no doubt lurking in some laboratory, waiting to be tested, proven and deployed. It will happen in record time, and when it happens our response will be "about time." It will cause less jubilation than the launch of a new app. In America. In Africa I think they'll appreciate it.
Repeal the Second Amendment.
If the people don't want guns in their society, they should have the right to ban them. Or, at the very least, keep them out of the hands of idiots who aren't sane enough to pass the Driver's Exam. But we can't even do that, because of the tyrannical, obsolete, absurd, outdated Second Amendment.
Dear Hillary, Announce Now
Hillary Clinton needs to announce now and remove any uncertainty about her candidacy. As long as she’s in the race, announced or otherwise, she’ll get all the attention on the Democratic side. If she’s not going to run, she needs to step aside immediately.
A reluctant defense of Political Correctness
A little love for political correctness, the ugly stepchild of cultural discourse. Political correctness,properly understood, is merely the code of honor, doing its essential work: holding society together in the absence of any other agreed moral/religious standards of behavior.
Monday, December 16, 2013(4 comments)
The Case for Market Socialism
When an economy fails to serve the people it's a failed economy. The markets have driven global capitalism into a ditch.
To fix it, we need some new ideas. Here's one.
Supreme Court Schizophrenia
When we say the Supreme Court has been politicized we besmirch the meaning of politics. They're fan boys for the GOP.
Tuesday, June 11, 2013(1 comments)
A call from Justice
Justice is a universal human ideal. So why not build a society on that foundation? Why not reach for what we have always wanted? Why not Justism?
Wednesday, May 8, 2013(7 comments)
Perchance to Dream
The patient has cancer, diabetes, heart failure, bird flu and gangrene is setting in. We have been diagnosed.
Why doesn't it seem to make any difference? Is it perhaps because we're demoralized?
Let's pretend, just between you and me, that there is a way out of our dismal reality.
The Short, Sad Life of Greedaholics Anonymous
Sometimes it takes a grand human tragedy to put the petty problems of our petty lives into proper perspective. While we were nursing new year's hangovers caused by BevMo Beaujolais and generic Gin, the Important People of the World were trying, and failing, to recover from a terrible addiction: greed.
Tuesday, December 4, 2012(15 comments)
Victory in the Culture War
There are battles yet to come. But the tide has turned, the lines are smashed, the outcome no longer in doubt. We have won the culture war.
Friday, November 2, 2012(23 comments)
Romney fakes left, scores
Romney is running far to the left of Romney. That he had to do it is encouraging, that he may get away with it is depressing.
Thursday, October 4, 2012(2 comments)
Obama wins? So what?
Obama needs to make this election about the will of the people. As in, will the will of the people be thwarted, yet again?
Saturday, September 8, 2012(2 comments)
A liberal without ideals and hope is no liberal at all. Ideals are a promissory note. A liberal, by any name and at all times, is one who does his or her level best to cash that check.
The Debt Strike Pledge
Default was a bluff and our so-called leaders folded. The enemies of the people won.
Next time we should call that bluff and make them feel the pain. A call for a general strike on debt.