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allan@allangoldstein.com
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Allan Goldstein

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San Francisco based columnist, author, gym rat and novelist. My book, "The Confessions of a Catnip Junkie" is the best memoir ever written by a cat. Available on Amazon.com, or wherever fine literature is sold with no sales tax collected.

For those seeking more detail on yours truly, the following is from my website, allangoldstein.com, where you can partake copiously, and for free.

"Allan Goldstein lives in San Francisco with his wife, Jordan, and a minimum of two cats. His op-ed newspaper column,"Caught off Base," has appeared in San Francisco's West Portal Monthly for the past decade. Satire, invective and humor are specialties.

He also blogs regularly on opednews.com and on hypocrisy.com under the pseudonym Snark Twain. Other work has appeared in Spitball, The Baseball Literary Review, The Potomac Review, and several magazines including Rock and Gem and Pilot's Preflight. He is currently at work on his third novel."

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119 Articles, 0 Quick Links, 159 Comments, 1 Diaries, 0 Polls

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Willie Mays and fans at the Polo Grounds NYC, From ImagesAttr
(5 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Thursday, June 11, 2015
Loving the glorious relic that is baseball A love poem to a dying game, beloved of my youth and the blessing of my old age
Clueless Geezers, From ImagesAttr
(7 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Saturday, March 21, 2015
Hollywood's Great Generation Gap Fail Youth, they say, is misunderstood. What they don't say is that youth wants to be misunderstood. Being misunderstood provides an illusion of uniqueness. And it's hard to feel special when you Instagram your daily lunch. Old people are less misunderstood, except by young writers who don't get them. So here are a few clues. Maybe they'll make my next movie going experience less annoying.
The Contenders, From ImagesAttr
(7 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Saturday, March 21, 2015
The Coming Income Inequality Election The happy, shocking prospect that this election could finally be about something.
World War II Icon, From ImagesAttr
(4 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Wednesday, January 28, 2015
The Word War II Delusion War is murder. Sometimes defensive war is necessary. But what gave us the crazy idea that war can have a happy outcome for everyone concerned? World War II.
Ebola, From ImagesAttr
(4 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Thursday, November 13, 2014
The Sissy Cynic's Guide to Ebola The cure for Ebola is already here, no doubt lurking in some laboratory, waiting to be tested, proven and deployed. It will happen in record time, and when it happens our response will be "about time." It will cause less jubilation than the launch of a new app. In America. In Africa I think they'll appreciate it.
Demon Soda, From ImagesAttr
(5 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Thursday, October 16, 2014
Soda Tax Liberals and Other Political Disasters The San Francisco Soda Tax: A good progressive cause? Or political malpractice?
Ban Guns, From ImagesAttr
(35 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Tuesday, July 1, 2014
Repeal the Second Amendment. If the people don't want guns in their society, they should have the right to ban them. Or, at the very least, keep them out of the hands of idiots who aren't sane enough to pass the Driver's Exam. But we can't even do that, because of the tyrannical, obsolete, absurd, outdated Second Amendment.
Snowden and friends, From ImagesAttr
(5 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Failing the Edward Snowden Litmus Test. The job of our elected representatives isn't to persecute the whistle-blowers. It is to BE the whistle-blowers.
Terms of Service, From ImagesAttr
(6 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Monday, April 7, 2014
The Ultimate Meaning of All Life Revealed The last newspaper column you will ever read.
Hillary looking presidentail, From ImagesAttr
(6 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Thursday, March 13, 2014
Dear Hillary, Announce Now Hillary Clinton needs to announce now and remove any uncertainty about her candidacy. As long as she’s in the race, announced or otherwise, she’ll get all the attention on the Democratic side. If she’s not going to run, she needs to step aside immediately.
Futility, From ImagesAttr
(27 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Thursday, February 13, 2014
How not to make a revolution A leaderless revolution is a failed revolution.
Political Correctness, From ImagesAttr
(7 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Thursday, January 16, 2014
A reluctant defense of Political Correctness A little love for political correctness, the ugly stepchild of cultural discourse. Political correctness,properly understood, is merely the code of honor, doing its essential work: holding society together in the absence of any other agreed moral/religious standards of behavior.
Money versus people, From ImagesAttr
(4 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Monday, December 16, 2013
The Case for Market Socialism When an economy fails to serve the people it's a failed economy. The markets have driven global capitalism into a ditch. To fix it, we need some new ideas. Here's one.
ball and bat, From ImagesAttr
(4 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Monday, November 11, 2013
Ballots, Battlefields or Baseball The shameful confessions of a die-hard, left-wing baseball fan.
The American Weapon, From ImagesAttr
(3 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Monday, October 7, 2013
The Default Revolution; Occupy Default How do we make the default pay? We go on offense. Occupy the Default.
Stop the Gay!, From ImagesAttr
(1 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Wednesday, September 4, 2013
Staying Straight in Sochi The Official Guide to Olympic Behavior from the Russian Ministry of Sexual Hygiene
Profit, From ImagesAttr
(28 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Tuesday, August 6, 2013
The Unlovely Profit Motive Profit is the lifeblood of our economic system. But that doesn't mean we have to like it.
The real conservative bloc, From ImagesAttr
(3 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Tuesday, July 9, 2013
Supreme Court Schizophrenia When we say the Supreme Court has been politicized we besmirch the meaning of politics. They're fan boys for the GOP.
Justice, From ImagesAttr
(1 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Tuesday, June 11, 2013
A call from Justice Justice is a universal human ideal. So why not build a society on that foundation? Why not reach for what we have always wanted? Why not Justism?
A better world?, From ImagesAttr
(7 comments) SHARE More Sharing        Wednesday, May 8, 2013
Perchance to Dream The patient has cancer, diabetes, heart failure, bird flu and gangrene is setting in. We have been diagnosed. Why doesn't it seem to make any difference? Is it perhaps because we're demoralized? Let's pretend, just between you and me, that there is a way out of our dismal reality.

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