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Max Blumenthal in Jail: They Haven't Done Him a Chelsea - Yet

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GOLIATH: Life and Loathing in Greater Israel In his new book, GOLIATH: Life and Loathing in Greater Israel, award-winning journalist and New York Times bestselling author Max Blumenthal takes readers ...
GOLIATH: Life and Loathing in Greater Israel In his new book, GOLIATH: Life and Loathing in Greater Israel, award-winning journalist and New York Times bestselling author Max Blumenthal takes readers ...
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We're sitting 'round bar near our dear CIA,
Me nursing Joe's special called 'Punk, Make My Day,'
Wondering what to do with that lip-fuzz called Max,
And how best to teach him a few of life's facts,
Like how running this planet is best left to us,
So our moms can go shopping without any fuss.
.
By which, for examp', I mean low-priced fruit,
Permitted by Yankee distribution of loot,
Or the copious flow of cash to arms makers
And mili and intel movers and shakers,
Or the calm of life in the Land of Our Lord,
To which Max keeps taking his big inky sword.
.
He has every freedom and plenty of lib',
And all he can do is scare up every fib,
Ignoring the trouble to which we need go,
To keep the emphasis on stars and talk show.
Monday Night Football would scarce' be the same
If they couldn't turn lights on before every game.
.
We live with an ease the caveman would praise,
And all guys like Max do is go and hell-raise.
Now some of us wanted to do him a Snowden:
Chase him to Moscow in dacha abodin',
Others a Julian, and two guys a Chelsea,
Then like the song says, he's goin' like Elsie.
.
But pleasantly soused, we agreed on assault,
Without deadly weapon: two days in the vault,
Some shackles to whet his reflection and thought
'Bout a new book on what Armani has wrought,
'Cause this business of digging and raking up muck,
Distracts all from football and making a buck.

 

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"11/9 and the Terrorist Who Loved Bonsai Trees" is Philip Kraske's just-published novel. It can be found at his website: www.philipkraske.com

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