40 online
 
Most Popular Choices
Share on Facebook 33 Printer Friendly Page More Sharing
Exclusive to OpEd News:
OpEdNews Op Eds   

Doctor Trump Will See You Now (Satire)

By       (Page 1 of 1 pages)   No comments

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Trump sets aside a few hours a day of tv-viewing time to meet privately with top government officials who are stressed by the constant grind of dealing with the coronavirus pandemic, top officials said today.

One source gave additional information, saying the 45th president believes he has the skills to provide "happy-talk therapy" to his underlings.

"Trump cares deeply about the people who are supporting his effort to find light at the end of the tunnel," the source said, adding he has a "special fondness for Tony Fauci".

So, Trump turns off Fox News and "spends at least 45 minutes a day with Tony, reading passages from 'The Power of Positive Thinking' to him".

The source continued, "In a nod to the movie 'Field of Dreams', Trump has Tony repeat, between deep breaths, 'If you think it, it will come.'"

The president and Fauci, a world-renowned expert on infectious diseases, who runs the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, repeat the mantra while visualizing a light shining brightly at the other end of a tunnel.

Trump, it is reported, sees a great, big, beautiful wall on our border with Mexico during the visualization exercise. Fauci, though, apparently sees scientists creating a vaccine that can render Covid-19 "fake news".

At which point Trump and Fauci smile, face one another, clap hands and repeat "fake news, fake news, fake news". Peter Navarro, the president's go-to guy on trade and jumpstarting the medical-production chain during the coronavirus pandemic, also gets special time with Trump.

According to a second White House official, Trump comforts Navarro, who complains bitterly about how mean reporters are to him when they ask him questions on trade relations with China and whether the government is giving hospitals enough ventilators and medical protective gear.

"They are just doing their jobs, Peter," the president typically responds. "Just let them do their thing."

Wise and knowing, Trump adds, "Remember, we win when we lie to them or insult them. The public hate the media much more than they care about our incompetence and dishonesty."

Rate It | View Ratings

Steve Schneider Social Media Pages: Facebook page url on login Profile not filled in       Twitter Page       Linkedin page url on login Profile not filled in       Instagram page url on login Profile not filled in

Steve Schneider lives in Florida. He writes articles for Humor Times, Democracy Chronicles, The Satirist and OpEd News.

Go To Commenting
The views expressed herein are the sole responsibility of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of this website or its editors.
Writers Guidelines

 
Contact AuthorContact Author Contact EditorContact Editor Author PageView Authors' Articles
Support OpEdNews

OpEdNews depends upon can't survive without your help.

If you value this article and the work of OpEdNews, please either Donate or Purchase a premium membership.

STAY IN THE KNOW
If you've enjoyed this, sign up for our daily or weekly newsletter to get lots of great progressive content.
Daily Weekly     OpEd News Newsletter
Name
Email
   (Opens new browser window)
 

Most Popular Articles by this Author:     (View All Most Popular Articles by this Author)

Gangstagrass Band Joined #ElectionProtection Forum on Sept. 8

Some Numbers Off for Biden, Sanders in Broward County, Florida Election Auditors Say

Chad Won't Leave Votes Hanging in Broward County Florida

Election Watchdogs Prepare for 2020 Battleground State Contests

Trump Speaks from Underground Bunker

Election Auditors Teach "Free-Speech Mitch" That Democracy Counts

To View Comments or Join the Conversation:

Tell A Friend