She ruled her clan
Through praise and scorn;
Kiss her feet
"Cause you were born.
Honor thy mother
It's God's demand;
Obey the queen
Or face her hand.
Sing great praises
On her day;
Bring her roses
And go away.
Obey her will
And she'll be swell;
It's Mother's Day in Hell.
Take her to dinner
Bring her a cigar;
Pick her up
In your old car.
You get no credit
She turns in a flash,
She takes American Express
And cash.
Pack up the kids
And dress up swell,
It's Mother's Day in Hell.