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OpEdNews Op Eds    H4'ed 4/28/11

Oh my god! The gas prices! Someone should do something!

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This article will appear in some form in the April 27, 2011 issue of News That Matters

Don't worry about the speculators who understand about Peak Oil. Don't fret over Exxon's record-breaking multi-billion dollar quarterly profits. If capitalism is your thing then quit bitching. Quit messing with tax laws and price controls and waste-of-time investigations and support capitalism as I'm sure all my good Republican readers do -- and should!

So you want to follow the Congressional mantra of Drill! Baby! Drill! and maybe you even believe the lie that we're not producing enough energy, that putting more holes in the ground and sucking out more oil will lower prices. I can't believe anyone would fall for that ruse -- though you do because it's what you want to hear. Why? Because here's the deal: we're not only running out of fossil fuels but we keep demanding more and we adamantly refuse to conserve and use alternatives.

Let me state that gospel truth again: We keep demanding more and we adamantly refuse to conserve and use alternatives.

And if you think gasoline is expensive here, fret not! For we're paying less than any other industrialized nation and their economies are humming along quite nicely, thank you.

[April 2011 prices]
Canada pays around $5.65 a gallon. France, $8.29. Turkey, $9.96. Japan, $6.62. Australia, $5.41. Brazil, $5.98. Portugal, $7.46. Finland and Germany, $8.71 Italy, $8.29. Netherlands, $9.84. England, $8.29

When you hear a politician claim that high energy costs will hurt the economy kick him in the ass and tell him to stop lying to you. So quit yer bitching and embrace capitalism, fossil fuels and shun alternatives and refuse conservation!

Travel alone to work and play. Take short unnecessary trips. Drive your kid back and forth to the end of the street for the school bus. Run your engine for 20 minutes on winter mornings. Drive when mass transit is easily available. Keep your thermostat turned up high. Maintain the highest possible temperature in your water heater. Leave those leaky windows and doors for someone else to deal with.

Do your part for capitalism: Make Exxon wealthier, give the politicians something to pull your leg about and keep the Arabs rolling in American cash! Consume, Consume! CONSUME!

The previous article was made possible by the American Oil Companies and the National Republican Party.
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