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OpEdNews Op Eds    H4'ed 5/11/17

How Many More Fathers Must Die?

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How many more fathers must die? I ask this question for what should be obvious reasons, at least obvious to those of us being abused by the family courts in the United States and actually in all of our western so-called, civilized society. In the last couple of months, I have been told of 4 deaths of persons, 3 of whom I knew as friends and activists for equal parenting rights in our groups on Facebook and a fourth who worked in my own industry; he was a contractor who installed towers.

Having one's children taken away is without a doubt the most painful event most fathers will experience in their lifetime. I have said this many times but it is again appropriate here... "On the day that a man becomes a father, he realizes his reason for being, it is to care, guide, support, and love his child and family, when the courts take that away, they take away his entire reason for being" -- Donald Tenn

But then, not only is a father's reason for being taken away but via so-called, child support his ability to continue to show the court the truth, he is then stripped of his financial ability to garner legal aid or even support his family or meet his own basic necessary financial requirements. This is a result of so-called child support. I could talk about child support all day long, I know of it all too well, you see; my parents were never divorced, yet they both paid more child support than anyone I know. How could this be? Child support is about both parents sharing equally active roles in the lives of their children, caring, loving, guiding and supporting them in their journey through life.

In today's society we live in a world where for the most part both parents have jobs and educations or at least the will to work, provide and be treated as equals. I support equality and one's right to be treated as such probably more than most, hence this article.

However, all too many fathers are not treated as equals within the family courts and we all know it... Rulings are being made out of a gender-bias against fathers. Rulings are being made out of greed, family court judges impose child-support orders, which many times are far greater than a father can afford. I have seen orders garnering 70% of a father's gross income and more. Rulings are made based on federal incentives such as the federal funding through the Social Security Acts Title IV-d program or as a result of funding via the Violence Against Women Act or, all too frequently attorneys just want to drag a case on for their own financial gain until dad is broken financially, mentally or both. I have heard it, "We are going to teach him a lesson." What lesson and why? Why do parents fall for this? Someone has to be a winner attitude? Our children must always come first and the laws, the lawyers and any and all parties who do not agree, should be exposed for their beliefs and expelled from family law. We must not just state it, we must make it our primary concern, "The best interest of the child" and there are countless studies provided by the greatest minds on our planet but every good mum and dad already know, our children need both of their fit and willing parents in order for them to grow up to become healthy, productive citizens in our society. With that said, "If a father wishes to share equally in his child's life, our government should be tripping over itself to make certain that father is allowed to do so" -- Donald Tenn

Personally, I believe in equally shared parenting and with that being the case, I believe the financial responsibility should follow the child. This should be the case except in matters of health care. Any and all hospital care, dental and such should be mandatory and should be shared equally by both parents.

Is this how a fair and just system should operate? Or, should we continue killing dads and destroying generations of families?

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Father but never a daddy to my children, Christopher Joseph, Leesha Dawn and Madison Nicole Tenn.

As such I have been forced out of the love for my children to become an out spoken Activist, Agitator, Antagonist and Firebrand for our (more...)

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