And I live a "better than the alternative" lifestyle. Meaning, I'd rather be here with these issues than dead and useless to the world.
Good came from this.
Three years after treatment, in late-1998, I finally got busy living and moved on. One of the happiest days was when I released my first solo piano album - Scribblings, songs from which had been composed in my head for almost three years post treatment as it took that long for my left hand to regain it's strength and dexterity at the keyboard. Balance in my life seemed to have been restored. I may never be the Hollywood composer but at least I still had my music - a peaceful reconciliation for a 25 year old. A second album followed two years later and a third was composed but never released.
And so, in addition to the Vaudevillian cornucopia of maladies, chronic symptoms and physiological setbacks that I had learned to live with, they were but only the beginning, nee a staging ground for the true tests that were yet to come.
In 2003, my fertility returned however I will forever experience extremely low counts and below average motility. I must continue to spend $400/year in sperm banking in the event my wife and I require a reproductive specialist for fertility assistance.
In 2004, it was an intermittent arrhythmia.
In 2005, it was ocular and periodontal shingles along with the chronic onset of Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Colitis and Gastritis.
In early 2006, I began to experience catastrophic depression and mania. I was diagnosed bi-polar and it was the general consensus of my providers that this was yet another latent influence on brain chemistry from my treatments.
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