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SATIRE: LEAK - SARAH PALIN ON GAME SHOW

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Jonathan Leigh Solomon

 

Palin: Well,I’ve only been a governor for two years. I was on the PTA … one thing lead to another… now I’m a governor. Someday I might be president!  Who knows? Sometimes s--- just falls in your lap!  One day you’re holding teas for new teachers – next day you are outlawing abortion!

 

Foxworthy: Anything is possible in America, but I - - -

 

Palin:(Turning to studio audience.) Does anyone in the audience have a child with Down syndrome? I do! Because I didn’t have an abortion.  I deserve a lot, a lot, a lot, of credit for that. And, my daughter is keeping her baby!  She deserves a lot of credit...

 

Foxworthy: Governor Palin, maybe - - -

 

Palin: Of course, if we outlawed abortion then we wouldn’t have had a choice and we’d getno credit. Hmmmm…

 

Foxworthy: Your logic does seem - - -

 

Palin: It all begins in the home! Like you know that guy  John McCain? Senator of Arizona? He’s married. But I got a call from him a couple of days ago. Out of the clear blue sky! Says he wants to “vet” me! Vet?! Yeah well, vet some other babe! Says we’re  “soulmates!” Ha! That line might work in a hotel in Hanoi buster, but I just hung up the phone. So what if you stays in a lot of hotels? You know what kind of guy keeps checking into hotels? Homosexuals! Homosexuals on their honeymoons!  What kind of family would that be for a child?  Traditional family values are what I believe in. I’ve got five kids and I put them first. “Working mother?” Ha! You wouldn’t catch me being a wor--- (Look of horror.) Oh my God… I have to resign!

 

Foxworthy: Well, according to your logic - - -

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Jonathan Leigh Solomon is a (retired) stand-up comedian who appeared regularly on "Late Night With David Letterman" and the "Late Show With David Letterman." You can read his satire at Politico.Com and 236.com or listen to him sharing fact-filled (more...)
 
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