Because I was walking!
When my sons are with me they do feel the different types of energy and know that, yes, sometimes I'm getting hit on, but mostly I'm not. And when I am they're able to witness the innate kindness behind my rejection. It's a teachable moment as they learn and see my thoughtful rejection in action! And let's be real, we've all got to learn to be both the reject-er and the rejected!
So, for a while I forgot. I forgot that by denying myself the lovely activity I adore, I was avoiding teaching so many important lessons. Worse, I was teaching. I was teaching my sons and my community that I do need protection, and that my passion was silly and could be set aside.
If I don't walk down the street and smile and sing, how will the next girl know that she can? How will the men and boys know that it's okay to smile and offer a ride as long as they do so respectfully and with a comfortable willingness to hear "no thank-you"? If I hide, how many other girls and women will hide?
So, for a while, I forgot. But this afternoon, while my sons were away and my husband struggled to allow it, I walked.
I walked past all the men working on the phone lines and waved hello, I sang to myself and did a funny jig, I thanked a gentleman who offered me a ride explaining that I was enjoying my walk, and I revealed to a woman sitting on her stoop smoking cigarettes that I did not want to party.
I remembered!
I remembered who I am!
I remembered that I am always having an affect and that it's my responsibility to do so intentionally.
I've no longer got a rotting stench on the back burner, or all of those pests that value its sustenance.
I forgot for a while. But then"
I remembered!!
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