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General News    H4'ed 5/6/15

Humor-- Rail Rage A growing Social Problem

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Martha Rosenberg
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(Note: Sometimes a station agent will see your dilemma--you'll miss your train because of Nickelman in front of you--and let you through the handicapped entrance for free. The problem is when the agent takes pity on you and you run up the stairs, the train you heard and thought was yours, is usually going in the other direction.)

Catching the Train--Not

Generally speaking if you run for a train, falling "upstairs" on your knees, the conductor will see you and pull away as you approach.

If the conductor waits and lets you on board, it is because the train is scheduled to sit and wait 500 feet down the tracks so you have gained no time-- especially when you are late.

If it's cold out, the train will sit with its doors open inexplicably. Aren't you glad you caught your train?

Inclement Weather

Bad weather is the main reason people want to drive and not ride the train. If it is cold out, the heat lamps will be broken or the crowd will not let you near them since they were there first.

If it's hot out and the heat lamps are inexplicably working, the crowd won't let you escape them since they were there first.

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Martha Rosenberg is an award-winning investigative public health reporter who covers the food, drug and gun industries. Her first book, Born With A Junk Food Deficiency: How Flaks, Quacks and Hacks Pimp The Public Health, is distributed by (more...)
 

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