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Sci Tech    H4'ed 12/20/09

Facebook and Me: The Breakup

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Let's face it, Facebook. You and I are no longer the happy couple we once were. There was a time when I couldn't wait to waste numerous hours that should have been productive rush into your arms and catch up on every single annoying detail with all my friends. But there's just too much nonsense going on over there now. Social networking (to me) means having a personal interaction with people and not dismissing every request to accept a Lil Green Patch or play Mafia Wars. Regretfully, I submit the following reasons for why I am officially breaking up with you.

Because if I am going to get "poked", I want to feel it.

I already have a closet full of Manolo Blahnik shoes; I don't need virtual ones.

I don't really care who what you ate for dinner.

Your children and your pets are not nearly as cute or as interesting as you think they are. Except to you.

If I really felt like "chatting", I'd call you.

Friends don't let friends invite you to join causes you care nothing about.

Because I don't want to become your "fan". I'm not even sure I want to be your friend.

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Patricia A. Smith is a writer and artist (and sometimes both at the same time). A former columnist, restaurant critic and cruise line executive, Smith has lived in London, Greece, Denmark, Hungary, Egypt, Costa Rica and France. She returned (more...)
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