I never had that kind of skill or drive. Being left-handed, the only infield position I could play was first base. Being too short for that, I was always relegated to the outfield. However, astigmatism kept me from seeing the spin on the ball when it was pitched.
Oh, would that I could pitch a 90 MPH fastball?
That said, let?s look into what might have been a far more equitable solution to the complete mess George W. Bush and Fiends made out of Iraq, Afghanistan, and the Middle East in general.
Instead of bombing the snot out of them, why didn?t we build them some Fields of Dreams?
Hell, Georgie used to hold a large interest in the Texas Rangers (where we had one of the most enjoyable ballpark experiences of all, I have to admit). He claims to be a ?baseball guy.? Who was more outspoken than Georgie when he assured all of us his ?pal,? Rafael Palmeiro, a dude he had once ?owned,? did not lie to Congress when he emphatically denied using steroids (while under Georgie?s aegis, no less).
It wasn?t but weeks later we learned through proof positive neither Raf nor Georgie should have spoken openly as they had.
Anyway, let?s teach the great game of Baseball to the Middle East. The recently concluded World Baseball Classic showed that not only is it truly an international sport, we discovered that the USA ? despite fielding a team of superstars ? is not the dominant force.
Besides the usual suspects ? Canada, Dominican Republic, Japan, Korea, Mexico, Panama, Puerto Rico, USA, and Venezuela ? participating teams came from countries where the game is relatively new ? Australia, Chinese Taipei, Italy, The Netherlands, and South Africa. Even Communist China and Cuba fielded teams, with Japan taking Cuba in the finale.
So, let?s start bringing the Muslim nations in step with the rest of the World by teaching them a kids? game.
There?s enough barren desert for the Army Corps of Engineers, Air Force Civil Engineers and Navy SeaBees to put up ball fields all over Iraq and Afghanistan.
We then trade balls, gloves, bats and other necessities of the game for small arms and RPGs. The ballparks are neutral zones, where no weapons are allowed ? like the gym in ?West Side Story.?
Once these guys feel the catharsis associated with whacking the cover off of a baseball, they?ll begin to focus on hitting that little stitched orb instead of shooting or blowing up fellow human beings.
Besides, after a day of praising Allah, practicing ball, more praising Allah, playing baseball, and praising Allah yet again in that hot Mid-Eastern sun, who?s going to have the energy to do anything but eat dinner and go to sleep?
The reason so many of them are in a state of permanent agitation is they haven?t any jobs to keep busy during the day. So, now we?ve provided an outlet.
Once they?ve gotten the hang of the game, we explain the benefits of marketing teams and regional ? but not sectarian ? rivalries.
Hot dogs (Kosher, of course, or at least all beef or turkey dogs) would sell like hotcakes. Think of the mark up!
Oh, would that I could pitch a 90 MPH fastball?
That said, let?s look into what might have been a far more equitable solution to the complete mess George W. Bush and Fiends made out of Iraq, Afghanistan, and the Middle East in general.
Instead of bombing the snot out of them, why didn?t we build them some Fields of Dreams?
It wasn?t but weeks later we learned through proof positive neither Raf nor Georgie should have spoken openly as they had.
Anyway, let?s teach the great game of Baseball to the Middle East. The recently concluded World Baseball Classic showed that not only is it truly an international sport, we discovered that the USA ? despite fielding a team of superstars ? is not the dominant force.
Besides the usual suspects ? Canada, Dominican Republic, Japan, Korea, Mexico, Panama, Puerto Rico, USA, and Venezuela ? participating teams came from countries where the game is relatively new ? Australia, Chinese Taipei, Italy, The Netherlands, and South Africa. Even Communist China and Cuba fielded teams, with Japan taking Cuba in the finale.
So, let?s start bringing the Muslim nations in step with the rest of the World by teaching them a kids? game.
There?s enough barren desert for the Army Corps of Engineers, Air Force Civil Engineers and Navy SeaBees to put up ball fields all over Iraq and Afghanistan.
We then trade balls, gloves, bats and other necessities of the game for small arms and RPGs. The ballparks are neutral zones, where no weapons are allowed ? like the gym in ?West Side Story.?
Once these guys feel the catharsis associated with whacking the cover off of a baseball, they?ll begin to focus on hitting that little stitched orb instead of shooting or blowing up fellow human beings.
Besides, after a day of praising Allah, practicing ball, more praising Allah, playing baseball, and praising Allah yet again in that hot Mid-Eastern sun, who?s going to have the energy to do anything but eat dinner and go to sleep?
The reason so many of them are in a state of permanent agitation is they haven?t any jobs to keep busy during the day. So, now we?ve provided an outlet.
Once they?ve gotten the hang of the game, we explain the benefits of marketing teams and regional ? but not sectarian ? rivalries.
Hot dogs (Kosher, of course, or at least all beef or turkey dogs) would sell like hotcakes. Think of the mark up!
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