Then what happened? The parents called the cops. Again. You shoulda been there when the cops (and the emergency mobile crisis unit) arrived. Nathan started shouting, "The b*tch BIT me!" The crisis unit started screaming that Nathan was lying and how could he say that about his poor sweet parents. And the cops just stood there and shook their heads.
So. Now everyone is happy. The whole family is living the life they are used to. "But," you may ask, "what will happen next?" That's easy to guess. Just ask a cop. Half the local police force knows that, with Nathan forced to stay in that volatile situation by a well-meaning but clueless probation officer, the chances are good that the up-coming holidays could involve a possible homicide attempt (or at least major mayhem) on peaceful, Christmas-tree-light-festooned Wisteria Lane.
Down at the local police precinct, the beat officers are actually running a betting pool on who in that family will draw first blood before New Year. Place your bets early, folks. The odds are on Nathan but the mom's odds are looking good too.
Bottom line: l now avoid Wisteria Lane like the plague -- and I advise the cops to do likewise. If your 911 button lights up involving that address on Christmas, guys, just ignore it and keep passing the egg nog!
PS: Now that I think about it, there are clear correlations between the White House fiasco and the fiasco on Wisteria Lane: Dubya's dysfunctional family has ulterior motives disguised as "Patriotism" and an uncontrolled drive for power -- and soap opera. Jordan's dysfunctional family also has ulterior motives disguised as "Good Parenting" and an uncontrolled drive for power -- and soap opera.
PPS: There is actually another episode of "Brat Camp" being produced for next season and this time it takes place at Aspen Achievement Academy, one of the several brat camps that Jordan was forced to attend. Sorry, guys, he's not in this episode. Maybe next time?
I only wish that they would do an episode of "Brat Camp" where Dubya, Condi, Rummy and Dick are the campers. And the Leavenworth Federal Penitentiary Achievement Academy sounds like a great place to film it.
So. Now everyone is happy. The whole family is living the life they are used to. "But," you may ask, "what will happen next?" That's easy to guess. Just ask a cop. Half the local police force knows that, with Nathan forced to stay in that volatile situation by a well-meaning but clueless probation officer, the chances are good that the up-coming holidays could involve a possible homicide attempt (or at least major mayhem) on peaceful, Christmas-tree-light-festooned Wisteria Lane.
Down at the local police precinct, the beat officers are actually running a betting pool on who in that family will draw first blood before New Year. Place your bets early, folks. The odds are on Nathan but the mom's odds are looking good too.
Bottom line: l now avoid Wisteria Lane like the plague -- and I advise the cops to do likewise. If your 911 button lights up involving that address on Christmas, guys, just ignore it and keep passing the egg nog!
PPS: There is actually another episode of "Brat Camp" being produced for next season and this time it takes place at Aspen Achievement Academy, one of the several brat camps that Jordan was forced to attend. Sorry, guys, he's not in this episode. Maybe next time?
I only wish that they would do an episode of "Brat Camp" where Dubya, Condi, Rummy and Dick are the campers. And the Leavenworth Federal Penitentiary Achievement Academy sounds like a great place to film it.
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