There are a plethora of toxic books, by right wingers, excoriating liberals. So I came up with an idea. Do the opposite. Write a fun, funny book about how to love right wingers.
This is the first in a series of articles I'll be doing, and I invite others to get involved. How can you not love someone whose brain is so confused, so mushy, that he actualy prefers Dubya over... almost anyone? You have to have loving compassion.
The bible teaches to love thine enemy. Well, I want to work on loving right wingers. It's not like I haven't been working on it. I have close family who are right wingers, who think liberals are idiots, morons and fools.
I figure, this effort could do some good. I'm hoping to make it an extended project, so I invite other opednews.com writers and readers to take a shot at it, especially, if, for example, you are married to one, have an adult child or a parent or sibling or, horrors, an in-law.
I'd love to know how you do it. How do you love the right wingers in your life? My hope is to turn this into a book. Ann Coulter and other loveable neanderthal right wingers (see, I'm trying) talk toxically about liberals. But liberals are warmhearted (as opposed to reptilian... but sweet... we must be nice, remember, Ann Coulter. Oh. Did I spell her name wrong? Oops.)
Let's lay some ground rules for this project. First, don't be cruel... unless you say up front that this is not really about love. Funny is good. Al Franken and Michael Moore have dissected right wingers with wonderful humor.
I'll start off by making it clear that it is possible to love someone who is impaired. Matter of fact, it's hard to find someone who isn't impaired in some way. And if he or she isn't then, he or she is too damned perfect and that becomes, in itself an impairment.
There are all kinds of impairment. And it's pretty easy to start listing the kinds of impairments right wingers suffer... and cause others to suffer along with.
Actually, I can envision going through the DSM4 manual of Psychiatric Diagnosis published by the American Psychiatric Association, hunt and pecking for potential diagnoses that apply. Of course, we also have some mental health professionals who have already written about this, sometimes focusing on a particular rightwinger, like Dubya, or certain demographics. I figure, for this project, they're all fair game.
Speaking of demographics, there are some subgroups within which I expect to find some rich material-- and some where I've already found it. Then again, some of my prior writings have not been guided by the intention of love. I'll have to take another look at some of them, particularly those focusing on the diagnostic category first described by Michael Moore-- "Stupid White Men." Hell, millions of women have their own personal "stupid white men" they love. It'll be fun to interview and hear from some of these gals.
Here's one good reason to loveright wingers. They wake up. Okay, let me back up. The DSM III-R, a probably out of date edition of the psychiatric diagnostic manual, though good enough for my non-clinical purposes, refers to diagnosis 307.46-- Sleepwalking Disorder. One of the descriptions or criteria for this diagnosis includes:
" While sleepwalking, the person has a blank, staring face, is relatively unresponsive to the eforts of others to influence the sleepwalking or to communicate with him or her, and can be awakened only with great difficulty."
Hell, at least metaphorically, this sure sounds like a lot of right wingers to me. I've thought a lot about waking up right wingers. And since I started talking about waking up right wingers, a few years ago, guess what? A lot of them have woken up. Just look at the polls in the recent primaries-- 50% of NH Republicans and 46% of Michigan Republicans were just not happy with Bush. That's a lot of people waking up.
We don't not love someone because they are sleep walking, because they have not woken up. Matter of fact, one of the most touching, heartwarming experiences parents report is watching their children sleep.
Of course, when they're awake, they could be spoiled brats who terrorize the house, hyperactive destruction and chaos machines-- but when they're asleep, they're lovable.
Of course, there are those spouses who snore in their sleep. Voting right wing in one's sleep, or sleepwalking-- going through the world enjoying right wingnut radio pukes... I mean, lovable, radio talk show hosts like Rush Limbaugh... well, that's worse than snoring, isn't it?
A note about Limbaugh, Hannity and Savage. The process of learning to love right wingers is a long road. We're just starting on the journey. Being able to actually love Rush, Sean and Mr. Savage is really a challenge that should be saved for the end of the journey-- it's almost a holy grail search. Of course, when the holy grail is found, the kingdom is healed. So even the idea of loving Rushbo... has some merit. Just don't be too hard on yourself, if, at the start of the road you have difficulty thinking of him as something other than a toxic blowhard, spewing mental farts. Or add your own thoughts on him.
Rob Kall is executive editor and publisher of OpEdNews.com, President of Futurehealth, Inc, inventor . He is also published regularly on the Huffingtonpost.com. He is a frequent Speaker on Politics, Impeachment, The art, science and power of story, heroes and the hero's journey, Positive Psychology, Stress, Biofeedback and a wide range of subjects. He is a campaign consultant specializing in tapping the power of stories for issue positioning, stump speeches and debates. He recently retired as organizer of several conferences, including StoryCon, the Summit Meeting on the Art, Science and Application of Story and The Winter Brain Meeting on neurofeedback, biofeedback, Optimal Functioning and Positive Psychology. See more of his articles here and, older ones, here.
To learn more about me and OpEdNews.com, check out this article.
and there are Rob's quotes, here.
To Watch me on youtube, having a lively conversation with John Conyers, Chair of the House Judiciary committee, click here Now, wouldn't you like to see me on the political news shows, representing progressives. If so, tell your favorite shows to bring me on and refer them to this youtube video
My radio show, The Rob Kall Show, runs 9-10 PM EST Wednesday evenings, on AM 1360, WNJC and is archived on www.whiterosesociety.org Or listen to it streaming, live at either www.wnjc1360.com or here.
A few declarations.
-While I'm registered as a Democrat, I consider myself to be a dynamic critic of the Democratic party, just as, well, not quite as much, but almost as much as I am a critic of republicans.
-My articles express my personal opinion, not the opinion of this website.
I have this to say about that: People go for the money. You can flap YOUR left wing, your right wing, but unless you flap em both really really hard, and in unison, with a purpose and a direction and thereby produce sufficient velocity to arrest your rate of descent, you're just going to end up a pile of feathers on the concrete, there. My point among the flying feathers, here?
Vote Independent. The traditional winged approach to this is more closely resembling an ongoing car wreck than anything else, you don't want to see it, but you can't look away. So, attitude is everything, I'm for the reformers, the people that are going to go and start budget-cutting, asking hard questions, demanding public accountability, and if the people that are doing that anoint themselves the title of Pumpkin-Pizza-Taco Party or whatever, then those are the people that I'd support come election time.
But, one caveat: I'd like that in WRITING, please, as in 'put it in the campaign platform, and everyone sign it, and make it legally binding, and stuff'. Well, you can leave out the 'and stuff' part, but the rest of it should be boldface and leave very little room for misunderstanding. Why be so persnickety? BeCAUSE, if you're going to run for a public office and make promises and all this other stuff to try and get ME to vote for you, I'd like something 'on paper' in exchange for my vote that a) demonstrates that you're actually somehow qualified for the job b) that you understand what some of the current problems are, and have developed some sort of actionable approach to the situation, and c) you're not just trying to get YOUR chance to run the printing press full-bore for the duration of your (mal?)administration, which is essentially what we've got NOW.
Maybe there'll be an Accountants' Party...the accountants would sure have a ball with this clown circus we've got now...
by
truthtruffle (0 articles, 0 quicklinks, 4 diaries, 94 comments)
on Wednesday, January 16, 2008 at 5:25:09 PM
The first person I thought about was my dear Uncle Frank (also known as Uncle Moneybags). In the mid-90's in the midst of a very large and raucous family Thanksgiving dinner in Arlington VA, we started ripping on Newt Gingrich. We were relentless. Uncle Frank's face got bright red and he finally banged his fist on the table in frustrated fury and told us to stop. It just made it all so much funnier.
I mean how can you get mad at someone who defends the famous anthropologist, Newt Gingrich, who once said:
"If combat means living in a ditch, females have biological problems staying in a ditch for thirty days because they get infections and they don't have upper body strength. I mean, some do, but they're relatively rare. On the other hand, men are basically little piglets, you drop them in the ditch, they roll around in it, doesn't matter, you know. These things are very real. On the other hand, if combat means being on an Aegis-class cruiser managing the computer controls for twelve ships and their rockets, a female may be again dramatically better than a male who gets very, very frustrated sitting in a chair all the time because males are biologically driven to go out and hunt giraffes."
But, I really do love Uncle Frank. I mean really if I ever came into money, I'm sure he could help me with some very creative investments to protect it. Until then, he's got a kickass home theater to watch football and never buys cheap beer.
by
Cheryl Biren-Wright (19 articles, 22 quicklinks, 8 diaries, 346 comments)
on Wednesday, January 16, 2008 at 5:43:24 PM
I love my parents, and they both voted for Bush, both times (as far as I can tell--my dad, who is 87, likes to be coy about who he voted for, even with family). I try not to talk politics with them, ever, but just to love them for who they are.
But today I am driving my regular commute with an extra-broad smile on my face because last night I applied my new "Republicans for Voldemort" bumper sticker! The cool thing about it is that most older, died-in-the-wool right-wingers won't even know what it means, but younger folks will get it. Tag line on the website where I bought it is: "Fictional elections deserve fictional candidates" so that can be a point of discussion if someone asks who is likely to be offended by the fact that Voldemort is the epitome of evil.
Of course, to be fair, I should have another sticker on the left hand side of the bumper that reads: Democrats for Santa Claus!
by
Jan Saxton (0 articles, 0 quicklinks, 0 diaries, 5 comments)
on Wednesday, January 16, 2008 at 6:06:33 PM
My mother and countless nuns always told me it isn't nice to make fun of the impaired or the less fortunate---but it sure is on hellofa charge!!! Rock on.
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M. Davis (43 articles, 2 quicklinks, 14 diaries, 149 comments)
on Wednesday, January 16, 2008 at 7:04:45 PM
Sister called earlier and asked if I wanted to go to eat at Chinese Buffet tonight. She didn't tell me til we were on the way that her latest Womans Club friend was gonna meet her there.
Had heard a bit about the veddy GOP 65 yr old widow with a penchant for drinking so much she falls on the floor or needs a 911 call to revive her. Very 'charming'....NOT!
I really tried my best to stay engaged thru the thinly veiled nudge-nudge/wink-wink/eyeroll references to a cheap Jewish woman, a black woman and a CEO/CFO/MBA w/a PHD from MIT with a CIA background who had a huge skiff in the harbor and a........... that I just told her I was so distracted by the alphabet soup B S that I had NO idea what the HELL she was talking about. She started to go on about 'gays' in Government where-as I offered that it was fine with her to have backed a CLOSETED Republican Governor but after years of toeing the GOP mark GOP State Rep. Bob Allen was "the worst mistake ever made". As soon as he got caught in a messy PUBLIC situation.............they were the first ones to throw him UNDER the bus!
Expected my approval for her efforts to lower the membership fee to join the Womans Club so some new blood could be brought in Sissy said she paid to join so she would have a SAFE place to 'socialize' at......then goes on to relate who passed out where and with whom.........talk about a REAL eyeroll ? Seems to me a drunk is a drunk except rich ones prolly smell better unless, of course, they vomit.
I finally just left and went to the Dollar Store next door to cool off after Sissy said that Z was as 'political' as I was................obviously she did not mean Politically Correct.
Guess I won't be on the next open enrollment roster for the WC.............more's the pity! I also did not find humorous,at ALL, Sissy's self deprecating reference to her own status there by saying not only once .......'trailer trash' and "I'm just the cleaning lady... haha!" Just disappointed in Sissy cause I know she has never been anti-Semitic or racist and know she painfully dealt with the religious implications of her own homophobia.
At least the egg drop soup was good as were the crab legs!
by
APE131313 (0 articles, 0 quicklinks, 0 diaries, 1 comments)
on Wednesday, January 16, 2008 at 8:26:10 PM
During the 2004 presidential election cycle, I decided to practice the yoga of gettin’ along with Republicans. I mean, if I expect the Israelis and the Palestinians to get along, I figure I needed to start in my own backyard. I’d heard Danaan Parry (Earthstewards Network) tell four-kleenex stories of bringing together the Catholics and Protestants in Ireland, and I thought, hey, we need to do this here. Or at least I needed to.
So I decided to go square dancin’ on Sunday nights. I was in the Southwest at the time, and these guys was reel cowboys, I tell ya, dressed to the nines with 10-gallon hats, bola ties, monogrammed silver belt buckles, and those really pointy cowboy boots that could puncture a Goodyear blimp. And they was all “retir’d.” And most of them voted for Bush. When it was announced that Bush had “won” the election, one of these geezers literally giggled all night. I kid you not.
So clearly, the way to get along with them was NOT to talk politics. I mean, this is still a free country, and even Republicans are entitled to their opinions. But when you are do-si-do-in’, and spinnin’ around, your little endorphins are celebrating, and you know, you just kinda all have a good time together. And I always found these folks to be kind, and welcoming, and very helpful if I didn’t remember a call, sweet and encouraging every step of the way. They all greeted me with smiles when I arrived, and offered good wishes to me when we left. All in all, a lot nicer than some of the Democrat groups I‘ve been involved with.Not that I ever mentioned to any of them that I wrote flaming liberal opeds. But I had ‘way more fun dancing with them than I ever would have imagined.
So I figure, it doesn’t take any big heart or extra intelligence to get along with people who are just like ourselves…the challenge is to find the particular bridge that connects with people that we don’t seem to have a lot in common with. And there is always some kind of bridge that works for both sides, like Danaan Parry discovered.
And some of us have not always been liberals. I was a Pentecostal minister’s wife living in the Deep South, until a plane crash changed my marital status and blasted me into some new ways of thinking. Not that I ever voted Republican, or anything, even then. But these things can happen.
So I love your idea, Rob, and I reckon’ I might be able to rustle up a coupla stories for ya.
by
Meryl Ann Butler (43 articles, 41 quicklinks, 3 diaries, 343 comments)
on Wednesday, January 16, 2008 at 9:16:59 PM
There are no conservatives or liberals. Read http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Lofts/2110/E_LandMines.html and you will see there is only one party, the federal government. It passes its own laws without our consent, spends its money without our consent, and is about to make us all tryants.
As long as the executive, judicial and legislation branches act in unison imprisoning us while pretending they are fighting each other, we are all losers.
Are you a liberal? Do you oppose the illegal wars? News flash - Sens. Clinton and Obama support it - Clinton even more than the president.
Did you support Cindy Sheehan? Have you noticed how liberals violated her after Nov. 7? I am glad I am not a Democrat - I oppose the wars (which, apparently, most liberals support) and am working on Cindy Sheehan for congress.
What we need is an end to government control. I support the Green, the Constitution and the Libertarian parties.
Ironically, liberals support corporations, free trade agreements, the right of people to make money. Republicans oppose free trade, corporations, the right of people to make money. Don't believe me? It's apartheid - remember how South Africans didn't have the right to make money? (As well as the right to vote, own property, etc.) It took a Democratic president to divest RSA and end apartheid. Do you believe the right of South Africans to make money, which the conservaties opposed? See, you're a conservtive!
by
Barker (0 articles, 0 quicklinks, 0 diaries, 117 comments)
on Wednesday, January 16, 2008 at 9:52:22 PM
not all liberals support free trade. I oppose it. Kucinich opposes it.
And about Cindy-- We routinely publish her articles here.
Are you actually paying attention, or do you just spout off on comment boards without looking? You don't make a very good impression. Actually, attitudes like yours make right wingers look more lovable.
But you do remind me that liberals and progressives need to lighten up-- hold on to that passion and conviction while retaining a sense of humor.
(You too Ardee <G>)
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Rob Kall (802 articles, 3910 quicklinks, 329 diaries, 1693 comments)
on Thursday, January 17, 2008 at 1:36:10 AM
Is that someone who supports oppressive heavy-handed government? One who wants to maintain the status quo and use the police force to impose his or her will? If so then examples would be Obama, Hillary Clinton, Bill (Hunt you down and make you pay) Clinton.
Is a “left-winger” one who supports socialist big-government programs meant to redistribute the wealth? If so then a good example would be George W. (Medicaid drug program and no child left behind) Bush.
If you do not consider Obama a “right-winger” and Bush a “left-winger” then please define your terms. In the alternative, stop uploading meaningless drivel.
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Mark Bennett (0 articles, 0 quicklinks, 0 diaries, 47 comments)
on Wednesday, January 16, 2008 at 10:02:24 PM
So you think the drug program Bush pushed forth is part of Medicaid? Check it out Mark. It is a portion of the Medicare Program. In case you are unaware it's a program for Seniors and the only folks benefiting by this program are the stockholders of major multinational pharmaceutical companies. Also the NCLB law benefits absolutely no one in the public schools. It does, however, benefit lots of corporations, such as one that is headed by one of Dubya's brother, which allegedly help children pass the tests now required in all 50 states. None of this drivel being pushed by Dubya is socialist. It is corporatist or fascist because it benefits the wealthy. I'm guessing you ARE a Right Winger and don't like it that some folks have a hard time liking what is happening to our country. Right Wingers like you are surely hard to love as it appears you are deficient when it comes to thinking...
by
paz love (0 articles, 0 quicklinks, 0 diaries, 70 comments)
on Thursday, January 17, 2008 at 12:06:14 AM
I was reading Alexandre Solzenichen's, "GuLag Archipelago" during the elections for Y2K. I said to my father, "You know what's wrong with this country? Our representaves have not read this book because if they read this book they would see what mistakes they are making that are taking us to GuLag America". Bush then gave his econd campaign speach and he mentioned Solzenichen. I realized at that moment, GuLag Archipelago is a "road map". They learned from Stalin's mistakes how to build a better GuLag and WE are doing it. Bush most definately has a socialist agenda. He went to the UN to ask permission to defend the USA against a terror attack? A Republican goes to the UN? Since when? Bush has done more to destroy the conservative base than Clinton. thought Clinton set Bush up, as Bush Sr set Clinton up, and this Bush is setting the next UN NWO puppet (neocon or neolib) up. Why do you think that even with a slight majority in the houses, the Democrats have voted WITH Bush and against IMPEACHment?
by
Jeanette Doney (0 articles, 0 quicklinks, 6 diaries, 304 comments)
on Thursday, January 17, 2008 at 9:44:08 AM
Nazis were not socialists. They did not believe in
government control of the means of production or nationalization of any industries. The Nazis believed in private property ownership and private ownership of businesses.
Most people incorrectly assume because they called themselves "National Socialists" that it means they had something to do with 'Socialism'. They can call themselves anything they want. If they are not for public ownership of industry and property, they are not Socialists.
Generally, right wingers want to try to distance themselves from the Nazis because to people who understand economics and politics, it is obvious that Nazism is the result of one tilting too far to the ideologial right. Republicans often try to head that off by claiming the Nazis were "Socialists" and using the proof of their name. Dont be fooled by this.
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Steven Leser (208 articles, 44 quicklinks, 32 diaries, 1367 comments)
on Thursday, January 17, 2008 at 10:56:48 PM
Hire a ghostwriter next time, like Al and Mikey do
You know what would make this article absolutely perfect?
If it was - in any tiny, itty bitty way - the least bit funny. if just one of the jokes was funny, or even slightly humorous. Hell, I'd have settled for wryly chucklesome, or dryly entertaining.
Instead it sits there with all the humor of a gulag, only without the humanity and warmth.
by
Mal Ren (0 articles, 0 quicklinks, 0 diaries, 1 comments)
on Wednesday, January 16, 2008 at 11:56:21 PM
I am an immigrant. Current ethnic Jewish media ( in Russian language) is 100% Pro- Bush, racist, demagogic, hate- mongering and stupid. Yes, it all comes in one package. So are Russian-language TV channels, Israeli-based former Russian emigrants- writers and cultural leaders, Lieberman supporters ( not Joe, the Avigdor) and that results in about 90% of th
