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Dump. Flush. Repeat.

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So, what's the newest issue for the right-wing a**holes that infest talk radio? Now that Tea Bag Day has come and gone with all its weird support for the ultra-rich, what will Colonel Beck, General Limbaugh, Major Boortz and Pfc. Hannity use next to motivate their zombies? Glad you asked. Now, it's (gasp!) the report ordered by the Bush Crime Family last year and released by the actually elected President Obama earlier this week.

The report was prepared by the Department of Homeland Security -- another Bush Crime Family operation -- and addressed the very real possibility of right-wing terrorism, domestic terrorism, as in the murder of 168 people when ex-GI Timothy McVeigh decided in 1995 to bomb the Murray Federal Building in Oklahoma City. Last January, a similar report was released that addressed the possibility of left-wing domestic terrorism and, since that variety is non-existent, focused on fear-inspiring and terror-laced groups like the Animal Liberation Front and a handful of environmental groups, most notable one that demands an end to the industrial murder of the Earth (nervy bastards).

The new DHS Secretary, Janet Napolitano, apologized on CNN this morning after some veterans groups were offended by a reference in the report to combat veterans returning from the Bush Crime Family wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. The report said extremist groups may try to attract veterans. While the report did not specifically say that veterans are more susceptible to such recruitment, the fact is violent right-wing nut-balls do look for ex-soldiers and former Marines. The reasons are many, but not the least is the reality that most right-wing extremist groups are organized by, and chock-a-block with, lard-ass cowards, beer-bellied thugs who own lots and lots of guns, pretend they are part of some highly secret team that will eventually "free" America from the death-grip of liberal power. ("Any day now. We're gonna get the queers and the liberals and the Jews and the blacks and the peace creeps and anyone else who is trying to end freedom here in God's land! Hoo-ahhhh, America Haters!! Hoo-ahhhhhh . . .!")

Another reason former military personnel are recruited is the simple fact that most -- if not all -- right-wing extremists have never served in the Armed Forces (except in their masturbatory fantasies), have never served in anything actually, have no knowledge of weapons and tactics (which is why they're always depicted on Fox Television marching around and around and around and talking trash to the camera crew) and desperately want to experience the close camaraderie that can only be found in the life-and-death situations that constitute combat.

Of course, there is the obvious question of why, then, don't these right-wing extremists go join the military and actually experience all the excitement they feel they are missing? Because (see above) they are cowards and, anyway, they'd have to give up the beer and phony tough-guy bravado during basic training. Naw, can't have that. Rather, they run around in the woods and shoot squirrels and tell each other they'd shoot a queer just as soon as they'd shoot a squirrel. ("No sh*t, Bro! You lemme get a queer in my sights and I'd just blow his ass away! Boom! Just like that!")

In her televised apology for releasing a report that simply stated the truth, Napolitano noted that the Veterans of Foreign Wars, which bills itself as the nation's largest combat veterans group, defended the report. Glen M. Gardner Jr., the national commander of the 2.2 million-member VFW, said the assessment "should have been worded differently" but served a vital purpose. "A government that does not assess internal and external security threats would be negligent of a critical public responsibility," he said in a statement.

That reality was, of course, not reported by the slimy bastards who ranted and whined on talk radio about the unfairness of it all. The head of the Republican Party, Gen. Rush Limbaugh, opined, "There is not one instance they can cite as evidence where any of these right-wing groups have done anything," according to a transcript of his remarks on his Web site. "You have a report from Janet Napolitano and Barack Obama portraying standard, ordinary, everyday conservatives as posing a bigger threat to this country than al Qaeda terrorists or genuine enemies of this country like Kim Jong-il," he said, referring to the leader of North Korea.

It never stops with Gen. Limbaugh. The report was from George W. Bush and his Department of Homeland Security, not Obama and Napolitano and their Department of Homeland Security. But, leave it to Gen. Limbaugh, Colonel Beck, Major Boortz, Pfc Hannity (draft dodgers all) and the silly, limp Michael (Weiner) Savage to jump up and down, pound the sides of their cages, and, as they always do, lie, distort, piss and moan, and pump even more fear and confusion into our battered and near-panicked society as they giggle all the way to the bank.

Nice encore, after the smashing success of Tea Bag Day, boys. Gotta hand it to you. You Real Americans sure know how to start a new sh*t-storm even before the one you blew across the landscape yesterday has a chance to dissipate.

What a collection of absolute bastards.

 

www.mikemalloy.com

Mike Malloy is a former writer and producer for CNN (1984-87) and CNN-International (2000). His professional experience includes newspaper columnist and editor, writer, rock concert producer and actor. He is the only radio talk show host in America to have received the A.I.R (Achievement in Radio) Award in both (more...)
 

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I missed the part in that report about the threat ... by LITNUP on Friday, Apr 17, 2009 at 11:50:35 AM
primo humor; poignantly true.  Thx, Mike.... by Rady Ananda on Friday, Apr 17, 2009 at 6:09:25 PM
Some, or most, of us have reached the point where ... by Mike Malloy on Friday, Apr 17, 2009 at 6:56:13 PM
These people are being well-funded from within but... by Melody Clark on Friday, Apr 17, 2009 at 7:02:55 PM
"Dump. Flush. Repeat."Yep, that's wh... by Scott on Saturday, Apr 18, 2009 at 12:28:01 AM