I am a Navy Veteran. I served on the U.S.S. Yosemite, and
in 1991 was deployed to the Persian gulf as a part of
Operation Desert Shield. I received an honorable discharge
in March of 1993.
At some point during my service in the U.S. military, I
realized that my own patriotism was being used against
me to do the bidding of the rich elite that had intentionally
set in motion the circumstances which led to the Persian Gulf
War. I didn't figure that out all at once, but little by
little I saw evidence that my own government has often had a
hand in creating our own enemies. I like to imagine that had I
known at the time, when I was ordered to sail to the Middle
East, the extent to which the United States government had
empowered and armed Saddam Hussein's Iraq, I would have chosen
to be a conscientious objector. However, I can't be
sure about that, because I am certain that in 1991 I truly
believed I was playing a role in defending my country.
Because of my own experience, I have great empathy for
those Americans serving in uniform who take pride in their
role as a member of the United States armed services; I
honestly believe they are mostly unaware that their
patriotism is misplaced. Although, from the conversations
I have had with some of them lately, I can see that they
question many of their actions in fighting this endless War
On Terror.
Now, I am an anti-war/peace activist. I have been spending
quite a bit of time in Washington DC demonstrating against my
own government's policies of war for profit. In doing
so, I have been in a position to meet and talk with many
people from across America that were visiting the capitol
city; some of them have been individuals who have fought in
Iraq.
On March 20th 2005, I played a part in a week long 24 hour
a day vigil at the White House, sponsored by DC Anti-War
Network, to mark the two year anniversary of the U.S. invasion
of Iraq. One night during that week, I had a very interesting
conversation with a young man who was in the Air Force. He
told he had flown in a B-2 Stealth Bomber during the
initial invasion, and that he had personally dropped a lot of
bombs on Iraqi cities.
Trying to withhold my judgment of his actions, I asked him
the first question that came to my mind... "How did that make
you feel?"
I was quite shocked by his answer. He boldly proclaimed, "I
enjoyed it!" However, before I could respond, he amended his
remark... "Actually, that's not exactly what I meant," he said
in a much more somber tone, "I got a rush from it...
and that is what I enjoyed."
"Oh," I replied; without informing him, I instantly
starting to pray for this misguided person, as well as praying
for all those affected by his actions.
A couple weeks after the DAWN vigil had ended, I was
sitting at the White House Anti-Nuclear Vigil giving
Concepcion, who has been there talking to the tourists
everyday since 1981, a short bathroom break. In no time at
all, I was surrounded by a large group of high school kids who
seemed very interested in what I had to say. Before long,
another young man, who identified himself as an Army soldier,
entered into the conversation and said he was proud that he
had been in Baghdad fighting for my right to Free Speech.
Ignoring his comment about defending my freedom, I started
asking him about what it was like on the ground in Iraq. The
majority of the students remained silent and listened as he
and I engaged in a fairly polite dialogue. After he described
the conditions he was subjected to during his service, I asked
him if he knew about the Depleted Uranium that
the U.S. military uses in armor piercing munitions. He
said he knew about the low level radioactive material, and
admitted that he was often in environments that he thought
were probably contaminated with DU. He went on
to tell the stunned crowd of students that, although there
were official requirements for protection in such
circumstances, he and his fellow soldiers seldom used the
protection as it impeded their ability to fight; he
vividly described trying to breathe while choking on the
combination of smoke and sand he was forced to inhale while
fulfilling his duties. I responded by telling him and the
students what I knew about Gulf War Syndrome. He didn't
say a word in response when I detailed the increased cancer
and birth defect rates among veterans who had been exposed to
DU in Iraq and Kosovo. I then asked him if he had any
children. When he told me that he did not have any yet, I
replied that I sincerely hoped that any children he might have
in the future would not be affected by his exposure. You
should have seen the depressed look on his face as he weakly
uttered that he hoped so too.
My most intense conversation with soldiers who have taken
part in the Iraq War, was outside Walter Reed Army Hospital at
the Code Pink vigil that takes place every Friday night to
shed light on the enormous amount of wounded soldiers that
are brought onto the base under the cover of darkness. One
night at the beginning of May, Media Benjamin, Nancy Shia and
I were talking to a couple of young men who were at the
hospital recovering from their wounds; they came out to
confront us about why we were there.
Mostly, we just listened to them. We stood silently as a
soldier, who said he had been involved in the Battle of
Falluja, described his experiences there. After showing us the
scars that indicated where a bullet had entered into the front
of his throat and had exited from the back of his neck, he
explained how he had felt that his buddies in his squad were
like family to him; he said that he missed the feeling of
camaraderie he had felt.
I asked him if they ever prayed. He laughed out loud at
that. He said they did not ever pray that he could remember.
When I asked him if he felt like the members of his squad were
played the role of God in that they were the omniscient eyes
and ears that served to help each other stay alive, he agreed
with that.
The part of this particular conversation that stands out in
my mind the most is when he described the day to day routine
of his actions in Iraq. He told me some things that I have not
heard reported in the so called "liberal media".
He described how they would often raid schools, even more
than mosques, because that is where many of the insurgents
would hide out. He also told me that the one thing he felt the
worst about his actions in Iraq was that the U.S. Soldiers
would routinely round up the kids and use them as human
shields. I asked him why they did that, and he replied that it
was because the Muslims would not shoot their own children. He
repeated that he did not feel good about doing that, but said
that it was the only way for him to survive sometimes.
About that time, another soldier who had been listening
piped in and told me that he didn't mind us protesting because
they had fought for my freedoms. I didn't ignore that
comment this time; I told him I was a Navy veteran who had
spent time in the Persian Gulf the first time around, and I
did not need him to fight for me. Furthermore, I informed him
that my status as a veteran is not what gives me the right
to Free Speech, and that everyone was entitled to that as
an inalienable right. He intensely listened to me as I
went on to explain that I felt those of us who were
demonstrating and protesting were actually the ones who were
securing his freedoms, and that if it were not for
people like me, then the soldiers who are fighting in foreign
countries would return home to America to find that they had
no rights or freedoms left.
When he questioned me about this, I detailed my own recent
experiences demonstrating in DC. I told him how I was arrested
simply for peacefully kneeling on the steps at the U.S.
Supreme Court. I told him about the numerous times I have
heard Secret Service and Park Police blatantly lie to me and
other protestors in regard to the regulations at the White
House. I told him about how police in DC and NYC had
arbitrarily swept up peaceful protestors and innocent
bystanders alike in an attempt to suppress Constitutionally
protected Free Speech. He seemed dumbfounded; I think I
gave him a lot to think about.
I must note here that each of the young men I have included
in this essay have told me they would go back to fight for
freedom again if asked to do so. One thing I can
say about all these conversations, is that the soldiers
involved were all polite and able to maintain a dialogue
without any macho self-righteous undertones. I feel that the
people who have actually been a part of the Neo-Con's
perpetual war are much more respectful than the average
right wing zombies that yell and scream at me about how I am
committing treason for exercising my First Amendment rights.
