Living in a Subsidized Concentration Camp

Their mistake is in the scope of their description, for the Jews incorporated many aspects of their concentration camp experiences into everyday life in Israel. To survive a bit longer in the death camp, everybody lied incessantly. University Professors avoided being shot the minute they got down from the cattle car by insisting they were manual laborers. Israelis rarely wear a suit and tie unless they are being bar mitzvah or married. Religious women shave their heads after they wed to avoid tempting single men to stray.

A client paid my firm $45,000 for a robotic sewing machine. We shipped the device to Australia without the $10 programmable module needed to make it work. Ten days ago my computer Internet connection failed. The dealer claimed the computer was in good shape and the modem provider stated his device worked perfectly. After days of investigation, I learned a billing clerk had made a mistake erasing my payment and they had taken me off the Internet for non-payment. They were charging me 100 new shekels to re-connect. The clerk had been afraid to admit the error. In the death camps the guards shot anyone who admitted to a mistake.

To gain the upper hand in our divorce proceeding, my wife bribed a social worker and had sex with the judge. My attorney advised me not to mention this in court, as I could go to jail for insulting a public official. In the camps, the officers eliminated anyone who mocked the authorities.

In the middle 1980's hyperinflation quickly reduced all mortgage payments to a few dollars. To regain their profits, the bankers sold bogus 'shares' that soon became worthless. Since the bankers wore suits and expensive tennis shoes, they were not prosecuted. They were in uniform so to speak, so they were untouchable.

The concentration camp inmates quickly learned on pain of death never to rock the boat or to stand out from the crowd. The President of Israel dared to speak out against the low moral standards of his countrymen. He reminded us of the citizens of Eilat. Everyone there was a thief, a pimp, a prostitute or a hotel maid the joke went. The reaction was swift. The investigators unearthed an old bribery judgment against him. They held many documents of this kind [like the FBI] against the time the official stepped out of line or exposed the wrong people. Only the age [nine years] of the document saved him being two years beyond the Statute of Limitations. Although he resigned, the President did not go to prison.

Another politician was not so fortunate. His sins were success and popularity. Possessed of a gorgeous wife and a beautiful family, he was a Rabbi articulate and bold the leader of a minor far right religious party. Already, the other party big wigs envied him. When his party gained enough seats in the Parliament to control the swing votes between the two major parties, they set to put him down. Some years previously he had conducted considerable renovations in his home with the generous aid of a big contractor. Suddenly, the repairs had become bribes and the Rabbi went to jail for them.

Israeli parents teach their offspring not to volunteer for anything. When the guards called for a show of hands for a work detail, the inmates never knew if it was genuine or a ruse to select the healthy for extermination.

Several hospitals did medical studies for the large pharmaceutical companies. For the potentially lethal experiments the doctors selected newborns and the very old unlikely to complain if things went badly no consent forms signed.

One hospital in particular specialized in the removal of body parts before or after the patient died. The authorities allowed the practice because it was profitable and also freed beds for incoming patients. It also limited the number of those chronically ill. Euthanasia was common.

Similar to concentration camps, Israel is easy to enter but can be almost impossible to leave. How does one make a small fortune in Israel? He comes with a large fortune. Many new 'friends' will flock to his door with 'fabulous' business opportunities.

Every child born here is subject to mandatory military service. Thus, they are forbidden to leave the country after age eleven until they complete their army obligation. Muslims can decline service, but they will never hold a good job in Israel.

The one sure way to get out of here is to leave in a box.