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- 36 Reasons To Vote For Bush and Republicans In 2004
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- by James Boyne
OpEdNews.com
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- Vote for President Bush and Republican Senators and Congressmen
if:
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- You think $900/month ($10,800/year) is a fair price for a
health insurance policy.
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- You believe drug companies should prevent you from buying
Canadian drugs at half price.
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- You are a senior citizen and you think you are about to receive
all your medication for free because President Bush has passed the
“prescription drugs for seniors under Medicare” legislation.
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- You think large tax breaks for CEO’s making over $50
million are good, but your own CEO may have to cut the company
budget and eliminate your position.
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- You never work or get paid for overtime so you don’t care
about the recent Bush bill that will eliminate overtime pay for 8
million workers. You don’t know any of the 9 million unemployed
U.S. and don’t know anyone in Iraq.
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- Your state has a budget deficit of $2 billion but we
should spend $600 billion in Iraq.
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- You know Iraq has more oil than any other country in the world,
but no one knows where it ends up after it comes out of the ground
or who got the money for it.
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- You would like to see us attack Syria, Iran, and North Korea and
Cuba at a cost of $1 trillion, because they are bad and are
trying to get us and we better get them first. These rogue
countries are sneaky and have tens of thousands of nuclear
missiles and weapons of mass destruction pointed at us. You don’t
know how much $1 trillion is. (Answer: It’s $1,000,000,000,000
or a million million dollars. $1 trillion dollars could pay
for 25 million jobs that would pay $40,000 for a year. $1 trillion
could employ all of the 9 million unemployed for the next three
years. The United States could probably purchase peacefully all of
North Korea for $1 trillion dollars.)
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- You are a woman and want abortion made illegal, and want women
imprisoned for obtaining one, to teach them a lesson. You can
afford to travel to Sweden.
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- You are a man and want to make sure that women having abortions
is illegal, and that the men (also known at the “fathers”) who
impregnate the women are completely and totally blameless if such
a crime is committed.
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- You like Pat Robertson, the TV evangelist. You send him
contributions and you pray with him for the “passing” of three
Supreme Court Justices.
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- You are 100% for the death penalty and its OK if a few hundred
people get executed when they were actually totally innocent. It’s
the price we have to pay.
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- You think that 2 million people in jail is normal and we need to
lock up even more people. You think we have won the war on drugs
because no one ever talks about it anymore.
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- You think $15,000 to $30,000 a year to send your child
away to college is just fine and it’s a good buy.
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- You are a doctor and want doctors to be imprisoned for
accidentally or purposely causing an abortion.
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- You are a doctor and like spending more time with insurance
paper work, pharmaceutical sales reps, your office personnel, your
lawyer, phone calls to insurance reps and drug stores, and you
find your patients too time consuming and annoying.
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- You are planning to move to China or India and want a job with
an American company there. (Working for 35 cents an hour with no
benefits).
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- You never visited a National Park (Yellowstone, Yosemite, the
White Mountains) and don’t care about them. They look fine on
the postcards you get from friends.
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- You are a teacher and think that our educational system is tops
in the world.
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- Your town just rejected spending increases of $5 million
for additional teachers and much needed reconstruction of the
school buildings, and it’s closing a local medical clinic but
you think it’s a good idea for President Bush to give $50
billion to a few warring countries in Africa that are in total
chaos, so they can build schools, hire teachers, open clinics, and
then destroy them as they continue to kill each other in never
ending civil wars.
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- You keep getting Liberia mixed up with Lebanon so you don’t
really care who gets the $15 billion Bush earmarked of one
of those countries.
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- You like paying $2.00 a gallon for gas because Exxon/Mobil must
be hurting.
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- You don’t mind transferring your computer technology skills to
serving coffee in Dunkin’ Donuts for $6.00 an hour with no
health insurance.
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- You think Saddam Hussein attacked the World Trade Center and can’t
remember who Osama bin Laden is. You forgot who had the weapons of
mass destruction; us or them.
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- You believe that 40 million people without health insurance isn’t
all that bad. You think that the solution is that they just better
not get sick.
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- You think that your company enjoys paying most of your health
premiums and they probably have never thought about eliminating
your position.
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- You don’t know what the Homeland Security Department does, how
much it costs your State Government, and you can’t name all the
colors on the color-coded alert chart.
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- You don’t live in the Northeast so the electrical blackout
didn’t affect you but you think we should spend $18 billion on
the electrical grid in Iraq.
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- You think the 150,000 American troops are having fun in Iraq and
we should send more to protect the Iraqi’s from the Iraqi’s.
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- You think President Bush and the Republican Party deserves
contributions from the pharmaceutical and health insurance
industry and you don’t mind paying $200 for a bottle of
prescription drugs.
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- You like seeing constant TV commercials for powerful,
potentially dangerous prescription drugs because if you didn’t
you wouldn’t know you were so sick and your doctor wouldn’t
tell you about the drugs without you asking him.
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- You like President Bush’s tough talk and get a kick out of the
expressions “we’re gonna smoke ‘em out and bring ‘em ta
justice”; “we’re gonna get ‘em dead or alive”;
“bring ‘em (the terrorists) on”; and “we’re gonna
get ‘dem folks who knocked down da buildings”, and you think
this eloquent speaking, (prepared and reviewed by 100 Presidential
speechwriters) enhances our stature in the world.
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- You like to see President Bush getting off the shiny green
helicopter with his two dogs and he always smiles and waves and
holds hands with his wife and that seems nice.
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- Your main source of information is the Nightly News where you
hear 20 minutes of short sound bites from any one Presidential
candidate speaking for 15 seconds on the $600 billion being spent
on Iraq, intermingled with 15 commercials for pharmaceutical
products that “speak” for 30 seconds each. You especially like
the chemotherapy and rheumatoid arthriti commercials that show
healthy people walking their dogs on beautiful green grass with
beautiful sunsets with soothing music; and the commercials where
people have been cured of their diarrehea and constipation and can
get to work on time.
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- You voted for Bush’s father when he won and you voted for Bush’s
father when he lost. And you voted for this current President Bush
when he lost, but then you found out he won because of something
in Florida. And it’s easy to remember the name Bush, so you
might as well vote for him again.
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- You live in Florida and it doesn’t matter so “let the chips
(or the chads) fall where they may”.
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- I am a former staunch conservative Republican who will vote for Rep.
Dennis Kucinich (D-Ohio) a progressive, populist in 2004 for his
utmost honesty, integrity, common sense, and well thought out
positions on all the important issues facing our country.
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- James Boyne dboyne@aol.com
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- James Boyne is a freelance satirical writer. He has a B.S., an MBA
and a degree in Financial Planning. Mr. Boyne is former computer
trainer and sales executive for several major corporations. He is an
avid public speaker and has numerous public speaking awards. This
article is copyright by James Boyne, originally published in OpEdNews.com
but permission is granted for reprint in print, email, blog, or web
media if this entire credit paragraph is attached
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