Back   OpEd News
Font
PageWidth
Original Content at
https://www.opednews.com/articles/opedne_michael__070404_time_to_order_more_t.htm
(Note: You can view every article as one long page if you sign up as an Advocate Member, or higher).

April 4, 2007

Time to Order More Teflon

By Michael Bonanno

They called Ronnie Ray-Guns "The Teflon President", but could he have made more use of the stuff than Dubya is making? A quick (as possible) review of why it's got to be time to order more Teflon.

::::::::

“Liberals” don’t understand what’s really happening.

  
He can say that he’ll get Osama bin Laden, dead or alive.  After all, Osama attacked the US or at least sent some of his henchmen, now dead henchmen, to do it.  And you know why?  Because they hate us for our freedom, that’s why. I guess it didn’t occur to them to look for another kind of freedom if they hate ours so much.

Then he took a turn Northeast and said that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction and worked with Al Qaeda to take out the WTC and the Pentagon.  He ought to know.

He can say that he’ll disarm Iraq.

He can say that he is exhausting all “diplomatic” avenues while Blair’s cabinet is telling each other quite another story.  Has anyone heard of The Downing Street Memos?  I heard about these memos a long time ago.  There are a couple of web sites.  After Downing Street something or another.

Oh, well, the mainstream media did a commercial advertisement about them and that was the name of that tune.

Has anyone read a book called “Against All Enemies” by Richard Clarke?  It's a good book.  Clarke worked for The Regime on September 11, 2001.  That’s the day 19 men of Middle Eastern descent flew some commercial jets into The World Trade Center and the Pentagon.  Oh, yeah, I mentioned that.  Bush was exhausting something or another, right?  That’s right.  Now I remember.

Well, anyway, Clarke said that he was told to investigate Iraq after 9/11.  But Bush had just finished saying that bin Laden and Al Qaeda did the damage.  Oh, and the Taliban was involved too.  He never told the American people about Iraq.  Well, he never told them, he just started talking about it.  He started, Condi Rice started, Rumsfeld and Cheney were all too eager to start talking about it.

Bin Laden, the Taliban, Afghanistan, you know, where bin Laden lived, trained and found cover, was nowhere near as important as Saddam Hussein.  He had some sort of weapons that made mushrooms or something and all those people, The Regime, scared the shit out of Americans with stories of weapons and mushrooms and we needed to stop Saddam from launching those mushrooms and the American people knew that those mushrooms and what happened on 9/11 were connected, maybe organically, who knows.

He can say that Saddam was a tyrant and Iraqis really want Democracy.  He can say this as the mushrooms are sliding down the Teflon.  What mushrooms?  What weapons?  What diplomacy?  What bin Laden?  What Afghanistan?  What Taliban?

Support the troops.  Support the troops.  That’s the ticket.  Iraqis want Democracy. I don’t know.  I never heard any Iraqis say they want Democracy, but they’re grateful just the same.  I was convinced the day I saw that statue of Saddam fall in Saddam square on Saddam Boulevard.  It was then that Americans believed that purple fingers were the underlying reasons for our sending troops that need supporting.

Our troops are fighting for our way of life.  The freedom to say what we dare say is being protected by purple fingers and troops that need supporting.  If that wasn’t happening, we couldn't write articles about Teflon.

Some “liberals”, Bush haters, blame America firsters are making up this story that our President was in on the attacks of 9/11/01.  There’s this evidence and that evidence.  It can all be explained away.  Fires made buildings fall, even buildings that weren’t hit by planes.  Fires made them fall.  But “liberals” will make up anything because they hate Bush.

 

They’re Bush haters.  They are innate Bush haters, hated him before they even heard of him.  They hate America.  Why don’t they go back where they came from?  Try free speech in North Korea, in China, in Saudi Arabia. Scratch that last one.  They’re our friends and their suppression of free speech is their own business.  Who are we to tell them not to mutilate female infants while they’re suppressing free speech?  Not everyone can be like us, you know.  Bush was never involved in 9/11. Never!

There’s an explanation for everything that happened on 9/11 and if there isn’t, stuff happens.  Rumsfeld. Stuff happens.  Buildings collapse.  

What’s so unusual about that and how does that prove that our president had anything to do with it.  Just because buildings collapse doesn’t mean our president had anything to do with it.

Crazy ass “liberals”, America haters.  Those troops are over there fighting for the freedom that allows the crazies to say such crap.  So if they want to maintain the freedom to say it, they should shut up.  

 

Besides, it makes the troops feel bad and it encourages the enemy, Saddam Hussein.  Oh that’s right, he’s dead.  He can’t be the enemy anymore.  But someone is shooting at our troops, the ones that need supporting, and our enemy isn’t Saddam or bin Laden, who Bush doesn’t much care about anymore.  Our enemy is called “insurgents”.  And we have to kill those insurgents over there before they make us kill them over here.

Stay the course.  Stay the course.  What’s the course?  He can’t tell you.  It’s classified.  If he tells you, the enemy, who ever they are, oh yeah, the insurgents, will find out.

And thanks to those bleeding heart “liberals”, the insurgents now know that we’re spying on them.  Don’t you know that if we spy on every single American, we’re bound to run across some insurgents talking to sleeper cells in the US?  They’re probably just trying to wake them up.

If not for “liberals”, insurgents would have never guessed that we’re spying on them. “Liberals” – always spoiling the surprise.

So now the enemy knows that we’re spying on them thanks to the do-gooders.  Why can’t everyone be a do badder like most of The Regime’s supporters?  Well, isn’t a do badder the opposite of a do-gooder?  He does have such trouble with the mother tongue.

Bush knew about Katrina well ahead of time and promised to be there to help during the storm and hoped to god or someone like god that there’d be no deaths.  He sure sounded like he was aware that, as Brownie said, this is going to be “the big one”.

He armed himself with a guitar and headed for San Diego.  Condi went shopping.  Rumsfeld was still amazed that those terrorists hit a part of the Pentagon that was under construction anyway and didn’t hit where he has his office.  Lucky break, that.  Serendipitous, indeed.  More reason to kill the insurgents.

Even though he was told that the levees in New Orleans were in danger of being compromised from this Katrina thing, he admitted the obvious after all was over.  He said who would have known that the levees in New Orleans were in danger of being compromised?  He has a point.  That’s why he makes the big bucks.

What was he supposed to do?  He said he would help and he’s helping.  

He promised $250 billion or was that million or hundred million or all of the above.  What more can he do?

What was it that he promised? $65 million?

Damn Abramoff.  Where is he when you need him to help Native Americans, Indians, Redskins, Braves, what ever sport you’re talking, build casinos.  We need them built before those people, you know, those people, start thinking about returning to New Orleans.  What a gold mine that place can be.  But first it has to be Rooted, Browned and Kellogged.  If they come back, we need to tell them that they chose to move.  That’s right.  No one forced ‘em to move.  In fact, no one even helped them move.  Bush says, “Don’t blame that shit on me.”

Casinos are going to pay a whole lot more taxes than those people would pay.  In the name of security and reviving the economy, he can say that New Orleans will be eminently domained.

It’s not like The Regime is racist.  It’s had two Black Secretaries of State, one of whom they made a fool on the floor of the UN (I bet he wished that he was on the floor) and the other with whom they’re filling the fool’s shoes.  Maybe that’s what she was shopping for during Katrina.

But, really, can The Regime make anyone look more like a moron than they’ve made George W. Bush look?

Yeah, it was cute to hear him mangle the language.

Sure it was a hoot watching him look for WMD under chairs and desks during his speech at a media dinner on March 24, 2004.

Sure he makes members of his cult feel special because he allows them to witness his speeches in person.  It’s sort of like the velvet rope of political rallies.

And landing on the USS Abraham Lincoln in May 2003 in full military flight regalia claiming that “major combat operations in Iraq have ended” was priceless. For everything else, you need MasterCard, especially since the Bankruptcy Bill went into effect.  I guess he saw the statue fall, too.

At that time, luckily, there were only a few hundred dead soldiers.  No big whoop.  Now where has that USS Abraham Lincoln gone?  Is it under this desk, that chair?  Oh, man, the sense of humor never stops.

He can say that Iraq is like the Indianapolis 500 because we’ve turned enough corners to have made it back to where we started and there are corners up ahead that need to be turned.

Where’s a yellow flag when you need one?

The 2000 selection.

The 2004 exercise.

The 9/11 fires from hell.

The refusal to allow a 9/11 investigation.

The giving in to having an investigation with the following caveats:

1. The Front Man and The Rifleman aren’t interrogated in public or under oath.

2. Dr. Philip Zelikow quits his position on The Regime’s Foreign Intelligence Advisory Board to become The Executive Director of The 9/11 Commission, the guy in charge of investigations for the commission.

3. Condi doesn’t have to be under oath when she testifies. They lost this battle, but won the war.

a. Did the President see a memo stating that Osama bin Laden was planning an attack inside the US?

b. No, says she.

c. Did the president receive a briefing on August 6, 2001 entitled “Bin Laden Determined to Attack Inside the United States”?

d. It all depends on what the meaning of the word “determined” is.  Well, she didn’t say that, but she said something about “not remembering any reports... warning, that planes might be used as weapons.”

4. Mem’ries,/Like the corners of my mind/Misty water-colored memories/Of the way we were” If only Streisand was the NSC Director instead of Condi Rice.

Anybody know what God’s been telling Dubya to do next?  He says “God”, I say “The Regime”. Synonyms were never more appropriate.

Forget about it! Oh, that’s right.  Most Americans have.

Between 1992 and today, we’ve all had a civics lesson.  We’ve found out what is and is not an impeachable offense.  Stay away from those interns.


Authors Bio:

Michael Bonanno is an associate editor for OpEdNews.

He is also a published poet, essayist and musician who lives in the San Francisco Bay Area.

Bonanno is a political progressive, not a Democratic Party apologist. He believes it's government's job to help the needy and that leaving the people's well being to the so called "private sector" is social suicide.

Back