I decided to write Getting Things Off My Chest,first the blog and then the book, to open up about having cancer and facing down a trifecta of setbacks (disease, death, debt).My mission was to help women navigate their cancer journey with more information, more clarity and more confidence.Today, the blog is less about coping with cancer and more about coping with the challenges of everyday life and maintaining a healthy balance

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Melanie Young
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Author, Advocate, Life Coach, Breast Cancer Survivor, Melanie Young

My guest today is author, business woman, and breast cancer survivor, Melanie Young. Welcome to OpEdNews, Melanie. A number of years ago, you started a blog which you called Getting Things Off My Chest. Why?

Getting Things Off My Chest started as a blog to open up about my breast cancer, share my experience to help others and find my voice doing something that brings me pleasure: writing.

I was diagnosed with stage two breast cancer in August 2009 after discovering a lump in my left breast during a self-examination. At the time, I was on a business trip in Italy. The same month, my beloved father and business advisor, Mel Young, was admitted to hospice with metastasized prostate cancer that had crept into his brain. I'm an only child. I cannot imagine the pressure on my mother to care for a dying husband of 52 years in Chattanooga and a daughter facing a double mastectomy in New York City.

Yikes!

At the time of my diagnosis, I was running an eponymous public relations agency called M. Young Communications. I had an outstanding reputation, creating some of this nation's most prestigious culinary events including The James Beard Foundation Awards. But the economic downturn had taken its toll. I was a newlywed, deeply in debt and working like crazy to rebuild my business. I decided to keep my diagnosis close to my chest and not tell anyone in my professional life out of fear I would lose business, just when I had started to successfully rebuild. I just plowed through, working full time while undergoing four surgeries and five months of chemotherapy wearing great wigs, makeup and clothes.

We buried my father after my second breast surgery, just before I started chemo. My last image of him was in a coffin. At that point, my mother and I learned the extent of the financial obligations my father left us to handle, especially me. The lawyers descended on us like vultures. It was difficult to handle as I was experiencing a good amount of chemo brain.

I decided to write Getting Things Off My Chest, first the blog and then the book, to open up about having cancer and facing down a trifecta of setbacks (disease, death, debt). It was one part therapy for me to write my story and heal emotionally. And it was one part therapeutic to write for others to help them understand that that you have to face cancer as a life sentence and not a death sentence; that cancer does not make you contagious and there should be no shame in being diagnosed. My mission was to help women navigate their cancer journey with more information, more clarity and more confidence. Today, the blog is less about coping with cancer and more about coping with the challenges of everyday life and maintaining a healthy balance.

At my time of diagnosis, I was carrying a heavy weight on my chest. Breast cancer was only part of it. My heart was broken about my father's demise - he was my rock. I was deeply stressed and was no longer inspired by the the type of work I was doing and it manifested all over my body. Getting Things Off My Chest lightened my spirit and helped me recover my voice and purpose.

Getting Things Off My Chest book cover
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Wow. You certainly had a lot on your plate, Melanie, between your cancer and your father's illness and death. You've mentioned that there were many things that you were not prepared for, that were not discussed or even brought up by your doctors. Your books go a long way to rectifying that lack. Let's start there. For instance, you mentioned chemo brain. What the heck is that? Is it a real condition? What does it look like?

Chemo brain is a mental fog that occurs with many people undergo chemotherapy. Symptoms include inability to concentrate, forgetfulness, anxiety and headaches. Think, "This is your brain on drugs." Intensity varies by person. In my case, it was hard to focus later in the day when I felt tired from work. I would forget words. My brain was blurry; it felt split in two. Writing and word games like Scrabble helped me cope. Chemo brain can last long after treatment ends. I address ways to combat chemo brain in my book because I found no explanation and no answers on dealing with it when I was in treatment.

Rather a large and major omission, no? What did you think was going on? Did you think you were losing your marbles? Not so smart from the "be in a good mental place in order to maximize your healing" strategy point of view; sounds more like adding insult to injury. Why do you think that the doctors do what can be considered an incomplete job at a very critical time?

Feeling like I was losing my mind was worse than losing my breasts. Chemo brain was unexpected. I had no warning and had to ask my doctor what was happening. Doctors treat the disease, not the side effects. And when they do address side effects, there is usually a prescription involved and no holistic guidance. "Healing" the patient is different from "treating" the disease, especially with cancer when "treatment" can make the patient feel sicker. I felt perfectly fine until I started chemo which made me sick. The patient must be proactive about her well-care by being vigilant about diet, hydration, exercise, sleep and stress management which can reduce the impact of most side effects. I am also a believer in patient navigators or peer support, who can help you understand what is happening to you and how to deal with it, That was my intention writing my book, Getting Things Off My Chest.

It sounds like there's a huge role there for patient navigators, whatever they are. Is this a role that exists within the health system, supplied and supported by medical facilities, or an import from outside to address a lack? Tell us more, please.

Patient navigators are a growing field and an important service. There are many different types to help you through areas of concern including, medical, financial, well-case/lifestyle. Most hospitals hire and provide patient navigators to help you through the system. I underwent training as a patient navigator through the Harold P Freeman Institute, a pioneering program in New York City. When you are diagnosed with a major illness, a patient navigator is a valuable asset to pave the way for you since you will be totally confused on what to do.

Nice! Are many of the patient navigators cancer survivors like you, Melanie? And what is "well-case/lifestyle" that you refer to? That's a new one for me.

Sorry, I meant well-care/lifestyle, not well-case. Well-care means caring for yourself - aka 'wellness" and making a healthy lifestyle changes. As a health coach, my goal is to help cancer survivors make healthier lifestyle choices to have a better recovery, adjust to their new normal and reduce their risk of recurrence.

Patient navigators undergo training to address the different areas that a patient will experience. Examples: dealing with the hospital finance department and health insurance, understanding medical terminology and what they mean, coping with side effects, Many navigators specialize in helping cancer patients but the service can apply to anyone facing a major illness. The Harold P. Freeman Institute Patient Navigation Training Program is pretty much the gold standard.

What a great idea! Most patients find themselves reeling from their illness and are simply overwhelmed by all the myriad details, however important they may be. Cancer is a toughie, no matter what. Losing a breast, or in your case, two involves so much more regarding our self-image, the way society looks at us and everything else. How does one deal with that? How did you?

I gave up two breasts to save my life. I had the choice to reconstruct and I selected silicone implants. It took about a year to complete, several office procedures, three surgeries and some tattooing. It was painful and required patience but was worth it and, as of 1998, breast reconstruction following cancer surgery is covered by your health insurance.

As it should be.

Breast reconstruction is a huge boost to your self-esteem. I worked hard to get my body in great shape, now have two gorgeous new breasts, a few scars and the rest of my life to live with more intention and in better health. In a final act of accepting my new body I posed for The Grace Project in March 2013 as part of an exhibition capturing the grace of women who have had mastectomies. Here is information on this project.

I just went to the Grace Project website. In a word: Powerful. You discuss preparing for cancer treatment as analogous to training for a marathon. Can you flesh out that image for us?

You need to prepare your body for surgery and treatment, both physically and emotionally. It's like training for a marathon because you want to be in the best shape possible to stay strong and keep your stamina. Cancer takes it out of you.

It is important to start a cleaner diet, go off all drugs even ibuprofen (bad for bruises) and nutritional supplements (unless your doctor states otherwise). You need to build up your body strength because, with a bilateral mastectomy and also reconstruction, you have little or no upper body strength for a long time! Working on building your lower body strength and core muscles is important. Your hospital will give you a set of exercises for your upper body. It took me almost three years to regain full upper body strength but, event today, I have some permanent limitations.

Physical exercise will also counter stress and improve ability to sleep. If yourbody is in good shape it will heal better. I also advise meeting with a nutritionist or health coach to review your diet and discuss ways to make changes that are right for you.

These are all very helpful tips. Thanks. How does a person reintegrate into her old life, start where she left off? I know you had specific challenges because of the nature of your work. Can you talk about that a bit?

It's hard for many. I say in Getting Things Off My Chest,you feel like the lion cub Elsa in the movie "Born Free" after being in the care of doctors for so long you are released to fend for yourself. This is when post-traumatic stress can take hold, which is a common post treatment side effect. It can last for a few months to a few years.

I decided to close M. Young Communications the end of 2010. There was no pleasure - only aggravation - and the company was not in sound financial health. I felt the stress of running a PR was not healthy. Today, I have a smaller more manageable consulting business that helps businesses - and individuals- build their brands. Otherwise, my focus now is building a successful writing, speaking and coaching career and my two radio shows.

My advice to anyone finishing treatment is to take it slow. You can't just hop back on the horse and start galloping off. Your mind and body need time to heal and this takes much longer than you will ever realize. Take time out for yourself everyday and learn to recharge your emotional batters and physical energy, release your anger, reconnect with what brings you joy and gives you reason for living and reframe what happened to you in a better light. These tips are the basis of my second book. Fearless Fabulous You! Lessons on Living Life on Your Terms which deals with emotional healing after a setback.

It's may be a little early to have much feedback yet on Fearless Fabulous You! but Getting Things Off My Chest has been out for a while. What kind of response have you gotten?

The response has been very positive and uplifting. . People tell me the book was like having their best friend hand hold them through treatment. People have thanked me for not sugar coating anything and really being honest about what to expect. I am especially gratified by the thank you emails I receive and praises on websites like Amazon.com. This is my first book and it was written from the heart with my common sense approach and my personal style of wit to face challenges head on. Getting Things Off My Chest is the book I wish I had as my guide when I was facing my own decision about my cancer. And it was a huge honor to receive both the 2014 International Book Award and USA Best Book Award for Cancer Health topics. Honestly, I believe every breast cancer center in the country should have this book available to patients. It's like the Lonely Planet Guide to taking a trip through Cancer Land.

Indeed! It sounds like those big awards for Getting Things Off My Chest was the icing on the cake. Fearless Fabulous You! is more general in tone, not cancer-specific. What about your two radio shows? What are they about?

My two iHeart radio shows cover two areas I am passionate about:

With Fearless Fabulous You!, I interview inspiring women, including entrepreneurs, activists, doers and influencers and discusses issues on women's health, wellness and nutrition with a range of experts. The show airs live Mondays 9pm ET on W4WN.com - the Women 4 Women Network and is podcast on iHeart.com. I love connecting with women who inspire and whom I admire.

The Connected Table LIVE!, co-hosted with my husband David Ransom, profiles the dynamic people work front and center and behind the scenes in food, wine, spirits and hospitality. Over the last 27 years, I have worked with and come to know so many people who have shaped the food and beverage industry. This is a great way to share their stories The show airs live Wednesdays on W4CY.com and is podcast on iHeart.com

Yes, when I wrote Fearless Fabulous You! my intention was a simple motivational book for anyone who feels stuck or has faced a setback, or who is contemplating reinvention who needs a dose of inspiration and fresh way to look at themselves and their challenges. I always kept these kinds of books by my bedside to reach for nightly or when I woke up to set my intentions, so that's what I thought about as I wrote.

After going through a very sad and frustrating time of my life, I feel I have found my voice and am using it new ways. If I can inspire others to do the same and be a role model for them, that's the real icing on the cake.

Thanks so much for talking with me, Melanie. I'm inspired by your positive attitude. and how you've turned a very challenging part of your life into some major lemonade for yourself and women everywhere.

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Authors Website: http://www.opednews.com/author/author79.html

Authors Bio:

Joan Brunwasser is a co-founder of Citizens for Election Reform (CER) which since 2005 existed for the sole purpose of raising the public awareness of the critical need for election reform. Our goal: to restore fair, accurate, transparent, secure elections where votes are cast in private and counted in public. Because the problems with electronic (computerized) voting systems include a lack of transparency and the ability to accurately check and authenticate the vote cast, these systems can alter election results and therefore are simply antithetical to democratic principles and functioning.



Since the pivotal 2004 Presidential election, Joan has come to see the connection between a broken election system, a dysfunctional, corporate media and a total lack of campaign finance reform. This has led her to enlarge the parameters of her writing to include interviews with whistle-blowers and articulate others who give a view quite different from that presented by the mainstream media. She also turns the spotlight on activists and ordinary folks who are striving to make a difference, to clean up and improve their corner of the world. By focusing on these intrepid individuals, she gives hope and inspiration to those who might otherwise be turned off and alienated. She also interviews people in the arts in all their variations - authors, journalists, filmmakers, actors, playwrights, and artists. Why? The bottom line: without art and inspiration, we lose one of the best parts of ourselves. And we're all in this together. If Joan can keep even one of her fellow citizens going another day, she considers her job well done.


When Joan hit one million page views, OEN Managing Editor, Meryl Ann Butler interviewed her, turning interviewer briefly into interviewee. Read the interview here.

While the news is often quite depressing, Joan nevertheless strives to maintain her mantra: "Grab life now in an exuberant embrace!"


Joan has been Election Integrity Editor for OpEdNews since December, 2005. Her articles also appear at Huffington Post, RepublicMedia.TV and Scoop.co.nz.