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March 8, 2010

The Artful Dodger

By Kathy Malloy

Gee, if you're so innocent and uninvolved in, well, everything, every dirt trick conjured during the Bush Reign of Idiocy And Incompetence, why'd the Bush Crime Family keep you around? Just to keep Cheney's picnic cooler stocked with nitro tablets, digitalis, and baby blood?

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America's favorite Bush Crime Family member is on a book tour and soon his pasty, uber-white face will be on all the TV talk shows, so stock up on your supply of Pepto. Karl Rove is the type of bland, benign-looking, nondescript person that upon meeting you forget instantly, which is exactly why he is so dangerous.

The architect of the Bush Cabal's eight-year plan to destroy America and wreak havoc on the Muslim world began his media blitz with Matt Lauer on the Today Show on NBC, and began by insulting the "stupid journalists" who "turned his name into an adjective" for dirty politics. (Uh, Karl. . .I know you're an expert on world domination and torture and manipulating masses of people through fear and terror and threats of the unknown, and all that kind of stuff, but here's a hint about conducting yourself on a media tour: calling journalists "stupid" generally doesn't win you any good press or further invitations.)

Back to the facts. The book is titled -- without a trace of irony -- "Courage and Consequence: My Life as a Conservative in the Fight," and in it the Dough Boy describes what it's like to be an adjective:

"I have become an adjective. There is something called a Rovian-style of campaigning and it's meant as an insult. One columnist said it consists mainly of throwing mud until it sticks. One prominent blogger described the elements of a textbook Rovian race as fear-based, smear-based and anything goes."

Funny, he didn't mind when the unelected idiot in the Oval Office granted him the appropriately fragrant nickname "Turd Blossom." But, when reporters call him out for mudslinging and fear-mongering that, as "the architect," he obviously designed, he gets his bland, run-of-the-mill tighty-whities in a huge wad.

Seems the issue Rove has with "stupid journalists" is in the accusation that he was behind the infamous 2000 "push-poll" in South Carolina that insinuated John McCain (Raisin Brain's opponent in the GOP primary) had fathered an illegitimate Black baby.Here's the exchange with Matt Lauer this morning on that subject:

LAUER: And you say, "To believe all the bad things about Karl Rove. First you have to believe that the electorate is stupid. Easily misled by smash-mouth TV ads, dirty tricks, and fear-and-smear politics." I can't imagine you ever calling the American electorate stupid. Who would be so stupid to do that?

ROVE: Well those journalists were.

LAUER: Okay but isn't the rest of it somewhat true?

ROVE: No!

LAUER: The charges or the allegations or the constant comments you hear about Karl Rove, that he was the guy behind the whisper campaigns.

ROVE: In South Carolina.

LAUER: Right. That he was the guy with the push-poll question about John McCain, how would you feel about John McCain during the 2000 primaries if he were, by some chance, to have fathered an illegitimate black child. You say you had nothing to do with that.

ROVE: Nothing to do with it. In fact, you know, I write about this in detail in the book. This is the kind of, you know, this is, this is a kind of thing the media love. These kinds of allegations.

Not that it matters, but there were many lessor minions in the Bush Crime Family -- and in the GOP -- that fingered Rove as the creator of that nasty little campaign trick, but more curious is why Rove would run away from it? From the book's excerpts, it seems Rove spends much of the book denying any responsibility for the very actions that defined the eight-year reign of terror he clearly orchestrated. He distances himself from the lies that led this country into the illegal invasion of Iraq, and claims outright that Bush "did not lie" about the nonexistence of WMDs in Iraq (that rumor was just another Al Gore invention, don't you know).

He also denies that waterboarding is torture (but if it was, it was Nancy Pelosi's fault), reluctantly admits to some foot-dragging in the Crime Family's response to hurricane Katrina, but, yet again, blames Democrats in Louisiana for the ultimate failure there. As expected,he vehemently disavows any involvement in the leaking of CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity; any role in the investigation of former Alabama Gov. Don Siegleman; pretends the administration's stance on global warming was scientific and appropriate; insists that no Clinton budget surpluses were squandered because Bush oversaw -- under Rove's direction -- the longest period of economic growth since (saint) Reagan.

Wow, what's it like on Fantasy Island this time of year?

Incredibly, Rove even refuses to own-up to the well-accepted homosexuality of his own stepfather (who raised him), Louis Rove, an "out" gay man known for his multiple, intricate piercings and gold body jewelry.

"I don't know whether my father was, at the end of his life, gay or not. I just don't. I don't think so, but I don't know " My mother never said to us that their marriage fell apart because my father was gay."

That story, he suggests, was invented by -- guess who? -- the media.

Gee, if you're so innocent and uninvolved in, well, everything, every dirt trick conjured during the Bush Reign of Idiocy And Incompetence, why'd the Bush Crime Family keep you around? Just to keep Cheney's picnic cooler stocked with nitro tablets, digitalis, and baby blood? Man up, Karl! Admit what you've done.Where's the "courage" or the "consequence," Karl?Where's the "fight" you bravely fought?

All I see is the amply Republican rear of your boring, beige Dockers and blue button down briskly running away from all responsibility for the damage you so gleefully and viciously caused.Turd Blossom, indeed.



Authors Website: www.mikemalloy.com

Authors Bio:
Kathy never expected a career in radio as a talk show producer. Born and raised in Atlanta, Georgia, Kathy was completing her nursing degree when in 2001 - in an emergency - she was asked to fill in as the producer of Mike's program. Within a few weeks she knew she'd found more than a temporary job. Since that beginning, Kathy has steadily grown more comfortable behind the control console, editing, engineering, and assisting in topic selection for the program while also retaining a fairly sizeable chunk of her sanity. Oh, and did we mention the utter (joyful) chaos of raising a daughter who, for some odd reason, only stops talking when she's asleep. Strange, that.



A life-long "talk radio junkie," Kathy takes her job with all the seriousness required, and thoroughly enjoys producing a talk show that's intelligent, factual, informative, and most of all entertaining. She takes great pride in -- and has great fun with -- the two biggest joys in her life: Their daughter Molly, and producing one of the most dynamic talk programs in radio.

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