This week a professional politician and tax scammer has been nominated to receive two prestigious awards for his courageous efforts to stand up for Republican principles and the citizens of America.

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In a startling break with long-standing tradition, this week a professional politician and tax scammer has been nominated to receive not one but two prestigious awards for his courageous efforts to stand up for Republican principles and the citizens of America, particularly the estimated 4,300 Kentucky citizens who would have lost their federal unemployment benefits, beginning March 13th. In the past 14 months, Kentucky has lost about 60,000 jobs and now has an unemployment rate of 10.7 percent. Nationwide, about 200,000 unemployed would have lost their benefits this week. Within one month, the number would have increased to about 1.2 million.

Shortly before midnight on Thursday, February 25, Republican Senator Jim Bunning of Kentucky reiterated his objection to a proposal for unanimous consent to a 30-day extension of federal unemployment benefits and other items. As a result of the tireless efforts of this stalwart member of the Party of No, No and Hell No, federal unemployment benefits ended on Sunday. Not a single one of his Republican colleagues told him to drop his objection.

Bunning objected that the cost of the bill would add to the federal debt, which roughly doubled during the terms of Bush the lesser without a single peep of objection from Bunning.

Bunning later relented somewhat by agreeing to drop his objection in exchange for a vote on his proposal to use unspent funds from the $787-billion stimulus bill. His amendment failed and the bill passed on Tuesday, with 78 votes.

Bunning and 18 other Senators, Republicans all, voted against this rare senatorial expression of humanity. In their collective vision, terminating lifelines to parents is the best way to help their children.

Bunning's failure to comprehend that spending stimulus funds also adds to the deficit can easily be explained by his limited intake of information. As Bunning bragged during his 2004 re-election campaign:

"I don't watch the national news and I don't read the paper. I watch Fox News to get my information."

Astounding. A senator who openly declares pride in his intentionally induced ignorance, to the everlasting detriment of the country and the citizens of the state he represents.

And he openly demonstrates his lack of concern. During Thursday night's floor debate, Bunning did not complain on behalf of Kentucky's unemployed citizens. Instead, he complained that he had been ambushed by the Democrats and, as a result, was missing the Kentucky-South Carolina basketball game.

The sometimes inconvenient overlap of Kentucky's basketball schedule with Senate schedules may account for why Bunning missed 21 Senate floor votes last December - almost half of all Senate floor votes during the month - including votes on the health care and defense appropriations bills. In December, Bunning missed more floor votes than Senator Robert Byrd, who is 92 years old, in poor health, and confined to a wheelchair. So much for Bunning's dedicated and hard-working claims.

In fitting recognition of his obstructionism, Bunning has been nominated to receive the prestigious "Fuck You Too" award, signified by a solid mud statue of a defiantly raised middle finger, proudly riding backward on the rear-most quarter of a male donkey, biblically called an ass.

I modestly submit that, rather than trample upon the increasingly desperate unemployed, Bunning should trim the deficit by moving his colleagues to void Kentucky's earmark requests, all 460 of them, which this fiscal year total over $2.6 billion. Bunning led Kentucky's delegation, with 99 requests totaling $720 million.

Included in Bunning's list of worthy causes is $12 million for Raytheon, which ranks fifth on the list of federal prime contractors. In 2009 Raytheon was awarded contracts totaling $5.94 billion.

Raytheon also ranked fifth in the list of contractors with a history of misconduct, such as fraud and environmental violations. Since 2005, Raytheon has been assessed $479 million in fines and penalties for aircraft maintenance overcharges, kickbacks, defective pricing, violations of the False Claims Act, violation of SEC rules and pollution of Tucson's municipal water supply wells with cancer-causing toxic chemicals.

Bunning also earmarked $17 million for Northrup Grumman for purchase and installation of infrared countermeasures systems on C-130 cargo planes operated by the Air National Guard in Louisville, presumably to protect them from a Pearl Harbor-type shock and awe sneak attack by the fearsome Taliban Air Force.

Equally as vital to what little remains of the future of America is Bunning's $3 million earmark for expansion and "enhancement" of the Patton Museum at Fort Knox. Clearly this is more important than sheltering and feeding the children of unemployed Americans who can not afford to visit the enhanced museum.

Bunning also apparently isn't concerned about decreasing the deficit by increased collection income taxes by elimination of fraud. At least those income taxes he would personally pay if his personal income weren't sheltered by use of the Jim Bunning Foundation.

Bunning, a former major league baseball pitcher, formed his "non-profit" foundation in 1996, the year he was elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame.

Working about one hour per week, Bunning autographs baseballs. Bunning donates the autographed baseballs to his foundation, which in turn sells them to baseball-oriented organizations. The baseballs are then sold by the organizations at events at which he speaks. His speakers fees are donated to the foundation. The foundation then pays Bunning a salary.

This circuitous procedure is necessary to avoid violation of Senate ethics rules.

Since 2001, Bunning has been paid $155,000 by his "charitable foundation". This is considerably more than it donated to charities, primarily the church he attends. The remainder is deposited in a mutual fund account that recently was worth about $146,000.

Why does Bunning fight to prevent lifelines being thrown to out-of-work citizens while also fighting to use loopholes to operate a tax scam? Because, as Republicans are wont to say: "Charity begins at home."

Bunning's wife Mary is president of the foundation. She, a family friend, and Rick Robinson, a lobbyist, comprise the board of directors. The lobbyist represents organizations that benefit from Bunning's earmarks.

Cornelius Vanderbilt's oldest son William was ranked as the richest man in the world at the time of his death. Nevertheless, father Cornelius thought of his son William as a blockhead and blatherskite and acknowledged that "William always was a fool."

William proved himself with his immortal 1882 statement:

"The public be damned."

Thursday night during debate, Bunning defiantly walked in William Vanderbilt's footsteps. From the back row of the Senate chamber, Bunning responded to Oregon Democratic Senator Jeff Merkley's pleas to drop his objection with:

"Tough sh*t."

In fitting recognition, Republican Senator Bunning has been nominated to receive the prestigious "Tough Shit" award, signified by a solid granite statue of his head proudly mounted atop a penis-shaped torso, biblically called a d*ckhead, facing to the rear while riding on the rearmost quarter of a male donkey, biblically called an ass. A generously sized mound of hard-as-granite ass-turds is delicately positioned beneath the ass of the ass -

which Bunning definitely is.

In voicing his Thursday night objection, Bunning declared:

"I'm trying to make a point to the people of the United States."

Bunning certainly did make a point -that he is an ass. The only American holding membership in both the Baseball Hall of Fame and the Senate Hall of Shame.

However, Bunning proved he isn't totally ignorant Thursday night on the Senate floor, by saying:

"We are not conning the people in the United States about anything. They know what is going on. That is why they are madder than heck. They are tired of senators... "

Amen to that. Bunning certainly hasn't conned me, with his self-righteous talk of fiscal responsibility underlain by his tax scams, or his lack of either competence or morality to hold a seat in the Senate. As former President Clinton told an interviewer in 1998:

"Bunning was so mean-spirited that he repulsed other senators. I tried to work with him a couple of times, and he just sent shivers up my spine..."

This sadly brings us to Bunning's successor. Bunning will not stand for re-election this year. Bill Johnson, the GOP's presumed replacement candidate, proposes that several federal agencies, including the EPA and the Department of the Interior, which is supposed to regulate mountaintop removal coal mining, be abolished. Johnson also supports more nuclear power plants, more tax cuts, a completely private health care system, elimination of IRS and its ability to catch tax cheaters like Bunning, and more defense spending. Johnson opposes extension of federal unemployment benefits, same-sex marriage, abortion and federal economic stimulus efforts.

Johnson is the hateful smirking face of the Kentucky GOP's version of hope and change.

God help us all.

Chuck Simpson

Authors Bio:
The author is a retired professional civil and structural engineer, reformed attorney, fierce Progressive, policy junkie, vociferous reader, lifelong learner, aspiring writer and author of the crime-thriller "The Geronimo Manifesto".

He is also a law-abiding but avid proponent of progressing America back to its earlier ideals of freedom, fairness, justice and opportunity for all.