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THE HANNITY BUMP

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Hillary Wins! Hillary Wins! Hillary Wins!
 
Down for the count, going in to the bottom of the ninth, she picked
herself off the mat and kept swinging the racket, finally kicking the
winning field goal on her way to a big time victory, said the mixed
metaphor pundits.  
 
But after being left for dead, just how did she come out on top? 
 
Was it because of her pluck or her luck? 
 
Was it Bill?  How about Stephanopoulus?
 
Nupe.  Not even close.
 
The man who swung the big bat that produced the winning margin in
Pennsylvania, sending the Obama crowd home dejected was one of Clinton’s former worst nightmares.  None other than that horrid vast right wing conspiracy all wrapped up in one hunk of Fox manhood.
 
Little ole Sean Hannity.
 
You think Colbert’s got heat?
 
Hannity's so hot, you could cook an egg on any one of his twenty-one
hours a week on TV and radio.

 
Think Chris Matthews plays hardball?
 
Try ducking out of the way of one of Hannity’s chin high, knock-down,100
mile-per-hour kitchen sink-loaded questions.
 
He may not have invented talk radio, but Hannity has ushered the talk
game into the steroid era. In this election cycle, Hannity has been doing
things that politically can only be deemed: unnatural. He’s not only
batting from the right side of the plate, he batting from the left...and
he’s doing it AT THE SAME TIME.
 
He’s not only pitching for his team, he’s become the designated hitter
for the second place team in the other division And he seems to be able
to knock it out of the park with one hand on the bat. He’s always been a
heavy-hitter, but this election, if he isn’t swinging a corked bat, this
guy has to be on the juice.
 
Sure, Al Gore was knocked back off the plate with hard up and under the
chin, brush back pitches, and John Kerry basically had to play hurt from
a severe swift boat knee-capping, but that was just your standard all’s
fair in love, war and politics gamesmanship. Hannity has pretty much
become his enemy’s (Hillary’s) greatest asset.  Think the Boston Red Sox
fans cheering for the Yankees.
 
"While the left wing moveon.org media fails to do their job," claims
Hannity, "all I am doing is trying to get beyond the candidates bumper
stickers and slogans and find out as much as possible about the people
who want the most important job in the world."
 
And he’s gone yard, touching them all, not only making the Reverend
Jeremiah Wright story an albatross around Obama’s neck, but personally
delivering the William Ayers debate question to George Stephanopoulus.
 
"The fact that the media was a full year behind us on the Rev. Wright
story, and months behind us on the Ayers story speaks for itself, "
claims Hannity. "Are the American people better off when they know more
or less about the candidates?"
 
Democrats may think that Hillary Clinton’s continued run for the big
prize may be just a waste of time, Sean Hannity Bonds knows that it ain’t
over until it’s over...and that means, if not a Hillary win, a
battle-scarred Obama, having to go extra-innings in the Democratic
playoff, will be limping into the November World Series with his best
hitters and pitchers on the injured list.
 
It seems like only yesterday that conservative talk radio did everything
it could to knock John McCain out of the race, and Hillary Clinton's loss
was a forgone conclusion.  Today, if Pennsylvania is any indication and
Sean Hannity swinging the lumber, January may mean a walk off grand slam
for right wing talk and McCain.
 
Look, I'm a confirmed, card-carrying liberal who's probably filled more
column space with anti -right wing radio rants - including royally
slamming Hannity - than anyone else on the literary planet, so don't take
this as in no way am I condoning Hannity's tact.  But I'm also a
Philadelphia 76er fan.  And as much as I remember hating Larry Bird when
the Celtics came into town, there's no doubt I would have loved having
him on my team.   I might not be happy with his approach, but winning the
championship and watching the victory parade sure beats the hell out of
whining "wait till next year (four years)."  

Award-winning TV writer, Steve Young, is author of "Great Failures of the
Extremely Successful" www.greatfailure.com

 

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