The prez got the big news at the fourteenth tee:
"What's Xi smoking? Or did the spooks spike his tea?"
Marco the Rube said it was quite a big shock,
Which Xi announced with no sense of ad hoc.
He said they needn't bring Taiwan to heel,
That it could secede and it was no big deal."
.
The prez stood like rock and ran a hand o'er his cap.
"But what about chips and the usual trade crap?"
"He said cross-strait ties would now grow stronger,
Like the Ming Dyn', but a whole lot longer.
Xi said, 'Heck, why give the Yanks cause for a fight?
We're all Chinese, we dig pork and we're tight.'"
.
Don watched his tee shot land in a bunker,
And said his driver was a lousy cheap junker
He'd bought as a favor from a bankrupt friend,
And for the nation's good the game would now end:
"Get me to Wash-town, assemble the Chiefs,
And I want ideas on maintaining beliefs."
.
In the Oval the C-in-C laid it on thick:
"We need a cassius bellow, and damnably quick!
The chiefs' ideas soon formed a good heap:
"We drug some pandas to attack our veep!"
"We say they sent virus on Swifty T-shirts,"
And stole our recipe for smoothies, which hurts."
.
Mister Prez listened, and now and then nodded:
"All fine and well, but folks have to be prodded.
T-shirts and crabby pandas won't do the trick.
Don't you have something with Nine-Elev' shtick?"
"The prob' with Chinese is they mind their own biz,"
Said a chief. "And don't mix dreams with life as is."
.
Mister Prez sighed and tapped the table with hat:
"The hell can you do with people like that?
They save their piasters, work six days at a clip,
Drink hot water, buy cheap food and don't tip.
Damn: talk about gettin' the rug pulled from under:
They release Taiwan and steal all our thunder."
