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Ok, that's it! "Holy Land " Label Is Officially Revoked

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We interrupt this program to bring you the following special, live news conference concerning the unfolding events in the Middle East...

This is Ian Jones of the BBC with breaking news. The lease that has been in place for thousands of years granting exclusive Holy Land Status to the area between Iran and the Mediterranean, is about to be pulled, or should we say revoked. And here in our studio is none other than God himself to fill us in on just what is up.

BBC:   Greetings God and thank you for taking the time to share this exclusive story with the BBC!

God:   You are welcome and greetings Ian. We felt you would do the nicest job for us and have the worldwide audience we wish to appeal to for input. We all were trying to pick out just who to approach with this and agreed that we didn't want to go thru the no spin zone. Too much spin you know!

Jesus: We all got a good laugh out of that one.

BBC:    Well, Jesus, welcome! What a pleasant surprise!

God:     Yes, I was saving it, but Jesus is always wanting to return to somewhere on his own and since we have canceled his return to the old Holy Land, I guess he wanted to be here on the BBC. 

Jesus:   Thanks Ian, so nice to be here and I brought a guest as well, Hope you don't mind.

Allah:     Well hello Ian, Allah here. Can't be revoking the Holy Land lease without ME!

BBC:      Wow, all three of you!  This is an amazing moment in time.

GOd:      Time is relative.

Jesus:    Dad...don't go there. They won't understand it.

God:       Sorry

BBC:       Well let me ask, just what was it that got you thinking the lease was up?

God:       Gaza...

Jesus:    Absolutely Dad. For me, it was that too, but also the hopeless quagmire or Iraq. I know you guys try, but you are missing a lot of stuff there and Holy just doesnt' cut it. We're all pretty sorry we originally picked the area in the first place.  Nothing "Holy" about it as far as any of us can tell.

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Dennis Diehl is a former pastor of 26 years,  who outgrew the Literalism of Fundamentalism.  He writes about Pastoral and Church abuse and is available to speak on such topics or be helpful to any church suffering under abusive (more...)

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