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Fighters take your corners: Political Satire

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Nov. 2, 2010

The crowd of American citizens had been anticipating this fight for quite a long time. They had worked themselves into a frothing frenzy shouting "JOBS, JOBS, JOBS", and "Knock the bums out!" The morning of the fight had finally arrived, the folks rushed to the boxing ring to place their bets early. You could feel the raw energy in the air.

It seemed as if the fight would never end; 15 long hard rounds. It had been a fight that kept everyone at the edge of their seats in suspense. Finally the results were in. Well, the majority of the points had been tallied. The judges were still arguing over who to award the last two punches to. Not that it would make any great difference.

The crowd jumped to their feet. The deafening shouts of "We told you so; you should have done what we said" could be heard around the country. As they collected their meager winnings from their bets, you could still hear the low mumble of "jobs, jobs, jobs".

In the red corner were the energized Republicans getting slapped on the back, dancing around with their trainers holding up their arms in a victory salute. In the blue corner the Democrats were slumping on their stools while their trainers wiped away the blood and applied butterfly stitches to their brows.

Standing at center ring is the rather shell-shocked announcer, Obama, looking around for those damn slurpees. Seems Pelosi had let him down again and was nowhere to be found.

The media rushed the ring and hurried to their perspective corners to fully analyze the events that had taken place.

Nov. 4, 2010

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Two days have passed since the infamous midterm battle and the new Champions have rolled up their sleeves and prepared for the work ahead. Or have they?

Apparently, they have not realized that the fight is over and it's time to go back work. They didn't hear the ring announcer call for them to get back to training together so they could put on a good show for the American citizens that had attended the fight.

No one has listened to the chants of the American people , because the last two days it's been nothing but each side tearing the other side down at every opportunity. The Republicans are talking about health care reform , their plans to insure President Obama has no second term, and putting out exaggerations about the President's upcoming tour to India . It is obvious that they are still punch drunk because they can't seem to answer direct questions. Not much of anything comes out except anti Obama rhetoric and threats.

The Democrats aren't much better. They are focusing in on Minnesota Rep. Michele Bachmann who informed Anderson Cooper about Obama's 200 million dollar a day trip to India But no worries, Anderson is "keeping them honest." All throughout Minnesota, Senator Bachmann's constituents hang their heads in shame. How could they have even thought about reelecting her. And Sarah Palin has no clue how that tweet got on her page and disappeared, honest. Well, at least she can see Russia , we really need to cut her some slack.

I'm thinking of adding to Sarah's foreign policy education by inviting her down to Arizona so she can see Mexico from my front door. It will make a great talking point for the 2012 fight. Yes the Democrats are making grand plans for the 2012 elections.

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Oh by the way, I found Pelosi. She was in her office giving away the slurpees to all her ex minions in the house. You see, she needs to butter everyone up to see if she will still have a job. She did break a way for one interview, but she's not saying anything about what her plans are.

BREAKING NEWS! Nancy's plan worked so she has saved her job and will serve as minority Leader. Wonder what she put in those slurpees?

No one has really noticed that Ben Bernanke is busy printing up 600 Billion dollars, laughing maniacally, as he tosses it out the window of the Federal Reserve.

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Laura Roberts is an outspoken activist, writer, environmentalist. She strongly believes in personal responsibility, something sadly lacking in the US today. One of her key projects at the moment is sustainable living and researching those who (more...)

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