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Dinesh D'Loser

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I love the smell of indictments in the morning
I love the smell of indictments in the morning
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Ever feel like you got hit right in the kisser by the comeuppance truck?

If so, you may be feeling Dinesh D'Souza's pain, right about now. After years of watching his career go down the drain, thanks to a succession of poor professional and personal choices, he has now suffered what may be the ultimate indignity.

Namely, he got busted: indicted for illegal campaign contributions, of all things. And he could be looking at seven years in the pen if he's convicted.

At issue is whether he convinced a couple of fellow conservatives to circumvent campaign laws for an old school friend -- Wendy Long, who you may remember ran for the Senate in 2012. If the name sounds unfamiliar, it may be because -- in spite of D'Souza's alleged "help" -- she got handily trounced by now-Senator Kirsten Gillibrand.

Be that as it may, a lot of money got shuffled around on Ms. Long's behalf, supposedly -- enough for the Feds to come sniffing around. The long and short of it is that, at the upcoming trial, both of his paying pals and Ms Long will be testifying against him, which might make for some interesting trial footage. 

At the moment, D'Souza's free on a $500,000 bond, and pleading not guilty. His lawyer claims this was not a criminal misdeed, but rather "an act of misguided friendship."

(If any of my friends would like to hand me $20,000, I promise I won't tell anyone.)

Now, if this had happened a decade or so ago, when D'Souza was still building a body of work that got him plaudits and praise from many conservative corners, there would probably be a virtual firestorm of right-wing ire raging on his behalf, right about now. However, this legal misfortune has the bad timing to have come after he's tripped himself up a few times too many to still have a lot of staunch allies; with the fallout over the crap book he wrote about Obama's ghost-father, as well as him losing his position as President of Kings College after admitting he was having an affair, somehow he doesn't seem to have the same layer of ablative armor he once commanded.

Indeed, so far the most forceful advocate he has on his side is the co-producer of his upcoming movie, America. His verdict? That this indictment is "criminalizing dissent through the selective enforcement of the law."

Which is incredibly ironic, given that D'Souza has always been one to call his adopted country to a higher moral and ethical standard -- when he isn't behaving like a bomb-throwing, queer-baiting, race-button pushing, paranoia-mongering bastard at any rate.

Oh well. Even if he hits rock bottom, and goes away for seven years, it's not like we'll be rid of him. He'll probably claim he's a political prisoner of conscience -- just like Nelson Mandela! -- and become a new darling for the right, and a symbol of Obama's evil abuse of the justice department...

Hmmm. Maybe that was the plan all along? Or am I giving him way too much credit, in spite of how well-choreographed some of his previous "missteps" have been?

Well, win or lose, jail or freedom, dignity or disgrace, he'll always be able to sell Christmas Trees for his friends. Maybe.

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J. Edward Tremlett is a lot of things, currently. He's back in the states after a seven-year stint in Dubai, UAE. He's been published in such diverse places as The American Partisan, the International American, The End is Nigh, Pyramid Magazine (more...)

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