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Becoming Behavior

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Alan Hodge
Message Alan Hodge

As a community, we need to be particular about the difference between sexual biology and gender.

My wife, with whom I've been in stupid ga ga love since 1975, resented having to put a shirt on at 12, never did less than the boys in karate, has always been ambitious and driven as a medical professional. She grew to become womanhood incarnate, and she (female, uterus-having she) is also the best man I've ever known. Everything I've ever looked up to in a man, she exemplifies. Courage, strength, loyalty, generosity, determination, kindness, warmth: the man who does not want these traits first in a partner is no man at all, imo.

Patriarchy and its tools; dogma, debt, and violence, insist on predictability and static mindset for us all. Reject that.

Let's feel what we feel and be who we are. Mutilation and wailing about being in the 'wrong' body is self hate. Pretending boobs and castration can make a feminine fella more feminine is sexist, misogynist, and not very smart. Not being as manly as you feel in your amazing female body is, forgive me, cowardly and immature.

Life doesn't hand everybody a straight person's role, and we should all celebrate that. What life does hand us is a lifetime project of becoming who we are: not fixing it, but learning it, earning it, and owning it.

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I had been working since the age of thirteen, forty-one years, before my retirement in 2011. Among my jobs were farmhand, electronics tech, journeyman toolmaker, computer systems admin, automation and robotics engineer, and automation (more...)

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