"Oh my goodness," said Alice. "It's the Mad Hatter!"
"Hey, Hatter," waved the White Rabbit. "Where have you been all this time?"
The Hatter grinned. "Long, long ago, and far, far away. The past few years have been too crazy even for me."
The Rabbit nodded. "I hear that."
"With those ears, you should," the Hatter said as he led them to a rickety outdoor table for a grande tea.
"So," Alice inquired as she sipped the warm beverage. "Do you have any wisdom for us in these challenging times?"
"As a matter of fact, I do," beamed the Hatter. "Swimming with ideas."
"Jolly good, dear friend," said the Rabbit. "About the pandemic?"
The Hatter rolled his eyes. "I said, about swimming. And the NCAA."
"Oh, I've read about this," said Alice. "A really cute guy transitioned into a really cute woman and is breaking all the records." A pause. "In swimming."
"Yes, I understand it's quite a kerfuffle," added the Rabbit. "On the one hand, cis women are complaining that she has an unfair advantage because of her years exposed to male hormones. And, on the other, barring her from competition in women's leagues would abrogate her right to express her true identity on the distaff team."
"Wait a minute," the Hatter raised a palm from his phone. "I'm looking up 'abrogate' and 'distaff.'"
"Me, too," said Alice. "Oh, I thought distaff meant something else""
"A real conundrum--dilemma," offered the Rabbit.
"Yes, leading to two very passionate perspectives indeed," said the Hatter. "But fear not, I have one of my renowned Solomonic solutions."
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