I'm kind of
an impossible person difficult to buy
anything for and trying to purchase something for me for Christmas is no
exception. What do you give the
woman who has very distinct likes and dislikes everything? For starters, you don't give her this:
the snowblower from hell
Man versus machine, my behind. I do not want either of these things blowing anything at me in my driveway.
Not to belabor the point, but I have an extremely acute
sense of smell, so I am very sensitive to
odors scents of any kind. Gardenias, brownies or cookies baking
in the oven, Marc Jacobs men's cologne (be still my heart, Mr. Wonderful) and
fresh cut grass = pleasant, appealing, yummy, good. What I don't want to have stinking up my nostrils
unwrap is exhaust from said man or snow blower, the smell of vanilla candles,
sachets of any kind, some God-awful perfume that I'll never wear or imitation almond
extract. Ever. While we're at it,
please rethink anything that comes with a diffuser or "oozes". Even open sores don't smell as bad as
cheap chocolate covered cherries.
When it comes to the jewelry department, do not be going
near a jewelry "department" of any kind.
Jewelry should be bought in a jewelry store. But let's be honest.
If every kiss begins with "Kay", and I find a box with that name on it
being handed to me, it will surely be the
kiss of death end of our
relationship. Think Bulgari, Tiffany, Georg Jensen. Think big. And
then think again. Whatever you
pick will not be " just fine" my taste. I don't want a tennis bracelet unless the diamonds are each
the size of Wilson balls. Let me
pick out my own stuff and you can write me a check for all my trouble. The last man that tried to buy me
jewelry got me this.
Yes. It was that bad.