A Bushel and AIPAC

Bet Ted Cruz wishes he had a Jewish Baby to exploit to AIPAC like the hairflap did today in the mass-pandering-fest. Cruz all but promised to turn the Gaza Strip into glass, while Donald Trump just kept yammering about how much he loved the Jews -- how many Jew friends he had, how his daughter is about to pop out a baby Jew ... I kept expecting Chris Christie to start pulling bagels out of his pockets.

Hillary Clinton and John Kasich also took their turn wooing the Jews. Kasich gave the grown-up point of view. Hillary reminded the crowd that she's the True Blue Jew lover of the bunch as demonstrated by her successful oppression of the Palestinian people during her years as Secretary of State.

What a surreal news day it has been. Watching the telescreens flip between shots of politicians ass-kissing AIPAC and Obama inspecting a gaggle of goose-stepping Cuban soldiers.

Oh, and then there was Trump's press conference where he defended his punch-happy supporters, and campaign staffers.

The only politician who avoided the Cubans, Jews, and bullies was Bernie Sanders, who stayed above the chaos while on the campaign trail in the West.