I can't begin to tell everyone here how much I love it when election time winds down to crunch time. It's then and only then that the real gems show up, and the real sh*t starts hitting the fan.
Case in point, Ted Haggard, leader of the 30 million-member National Association of Evangelicals, a vocal opponent of same-sex marriage. It seems the revved-up Reverend resigned Thursday after being accused of having sex with a man. Haggard also stepped aside as head of his 14,000-member New Life Church while a church panel investigates, saying he could "not continue to minister under the cloud created by the accusations."
The really juicy part is not only was he having sex with this man, Mike Jones, Haggard was also paying to have sex with him. Yes, if we are to believe the story (and I do), not only was this leader of the Religious Reich speaking out against gay marriage while having gay sex, he was also paying for his "sodomite" booty calls. Gee, I've never had to pay for it.
For the past three years, Haggard has been reportedly paying Mr. Jones two hundred dollars once a month for a nice roll in the hay. That in and of itself is the kind of revelation I live to read or hear in the press. If that were where the story began and ended, that would be more than enough for me.
However, the dirt only gets deeper from there. Not only was the revved-up Reverend Haggard paying to take a monthly ride on the baloney pony, he was also snorting crystal methamphetamine to give himself that extra sinful kick. Even that pales in comparison to the fact that there are voicemails from Haggard to Jones where the revved-up Reverend requests his methamphetamine by asking for, "either $100 or $200 supply."
Yes, there are voicemails, and according to Mr. Jones, they are, "pretty damning." Here's one that's pretty damning: "Hi Mike, this is Art [Haggard's pseudonym], I am here in Denver and sorry that I missed you. But as I said, if you want to go ahead and get the stuff, then that would be great. And I'll get it sometime next week or the week after or whenever."
Lest you think this is all smoke, and no fire, it seems there may be some flames underlying it all. Haggard is a married father of five. He has been called one of the most influential evangelical Christians in the nation. He has denied the allegations. However, the acting senior pastor at New Life, Ross Parsley, told KKTV-TV of Colorado Springs that Haggard admitted that some of the accusations were true, but Parsley did not elaborate.
Some of the accusations are true. Which ones, I wonder: the sex, the drugs, or the money. Maybe the truth is all the accusations are true. In one breath, Haggard denies the allegations, in another; he admits there is some truth in them. Which one is it? One cannot deny out of one side of the mouth, and admit there is some truth. Maybe, as with all serious homophobes, this is yet another case of the lady protesting too much.
I have said on numerous occasions the most vocal and pernicious gay bashers are gay themselves. If it is proved to be true that the revved-up Reverend was paying for booty calls with another man, as well as a dose or three of crystal meth, once again, my theory will be proved correct.
I just love it when hypocrites get the exposure they so richly deserve. Call it a weakness for watching the great fall, but I can't get enough of it. Much like Foleygate, hearing this kind of tawdry happening always makes my day.
The thing that makes this particular story so much more pleasing than any of the Foleygate dirt is that it's happening to a member of the Religious Reich. I have a special place in my heart reserved for members of the Reich who can't keep their instruments sheathed. So, obviously in this case, you can just imagine how happy I am to read this bit of news. The only thing that would have made it better is if it had been about Scary Jerry Falwell or the Insane Clown p*ssy, Pat Robertson.
I do believe if I ever heard that either one of those charlatans were caught with their pants around their ankles with a sweaty man behind them, I'd have to hop up and start dancing like a complete and total fool!
I can't help but be amused by the way things have turned out in the news for the Republicans. For a little while there, I was a bit pissed at John Kerry for his "botched" joke. Now, I just have to say, botch a few more, John. The Republicans and all their neo-con minions need all the help they can get.
Here we are, less than five days to the midterms, and the Republicans have done everything in their power to self-destruct. The Abramoff Scandal has borne evil fruit. Foleygate has brought its stark and lurid spotlight to shine upon the hypocrisy, mendacity, and the care only about themselves and their position attitude of the Republican Party. David Kuo's book has exposed the DUBYA regime for the liars that they are. Now we have the revved-up Reverend snorting crystal meth and paying for man sex. If there isn't a real turn over come the eight, then it's time to get out the torches and pitchforks. Oh yes, if this isn't enough fuel to make everyone and their brother pull the lever for Democrats, then the elections were fixed, and it's time for a real revolution.