By Missy Comley Beattie
Most of us have lost count of the reasons Bush has given for invading Iraq. WMD. Removing an evil dictator. Terrorism. Protecting Iraqs oil fields. Bringing Democracy to the Iraqis. The ground keeps shifting, but these five stick in my head.
Now, theres anotherone that the President has been anticipating about as much as he looked forward to National Guard duty years ago. Jury duty.
The conversation might have gone something like this: Hey, Dick, Condi, Rummy, Turd Blossom. If Im conducting a war, I bet I could get outta jury duty.
So what if a lot of people get killed? If I got saddled with a lengthy trial, I might not be able to ride my bike, or tread my mill. I dont know which would be worse, not being able to exercise or losing a couple of thousand troops.
Then Condi would have advised, The workout is important. Youre not in a very good mood when you miss one. And you can still exercise while waging war. Remember, you dont have to go. You could surprise the troops maybe on Thanksgiving once, but other than that, you neednt bother.
But my thinking is: Who would want George W. Bush summoned for that important civic responsibility anyway?
If I were on trial, Id expect what all of us are promiseda jury of my peers. And I dont think G. W. is my peer. Im not bragging when I say Im smarter than he is. Its not like Im a member of Mensa, but I can articulate a pretty decent thought and when Ive said something like, Fool me once, shame on you , I can follow through without a string of um, uh, um, uh. Certainly, if my guilt or innocence were being assessed, Id want someone who could examine all the evidence and make sound judgments. I sure wouldnt want a juror who would listen to the prosecution and the defense about something as important as a sentence of several years or maybe even the rest of my life and, then, adjourn to the jury room and manufacture lies to convict me. Nor would I want someone who would prejudge before hearing the testimony. I mean, what if he got a little confused and thought,she tried to kill my daddy?
And what if for some reason, he got in there and decided to do one of his stay the course numbersbe someone who could hang up all the other jurors, sequestered for months. You know, there might be no end in sight, no exit strategy. Id want to get the whole thing over with, know my fate. Youve seen those television trials where theres a lone holdout. Someone who just hunkers down, REAL stubborn-like and refuses to listen to reason even when each of the other eleven people is solidly standing together with the opposite opinion. Sort of like right now with the war. And all of us know how George refuses to admit hes made a mistake. My life could be at stake, and he probably wouldnt budge. Even if no weapon were discovered. No motive. That I had no connection whatsoever to any criminal elements.
Probably, though, Im worrying unnecessarily with all this talk of Bushs jury duty. After all, if he discovered he couldnt avoid this task because hes the President with HUGE wartime responsibilities, Im sure he could just call on his father, the biological one, as he did during the Vietnam War and go missing. Remember, he didnt meet his commitments then. And he hasnt matured with age.