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You Just Can't Make This Stuff Up!

By       Message David Glenn Cox     Permalink
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Sometimes you read this stuff and you just have to scratch your head and wonder. Is there some cosmic God of Karma? Some Don Rickles up on a mountain top throwing down lightening bolts and saying, "Well, that's what you get!"

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Bloomberg- The owner of Franklin Mint LLC, which sells collectible coins and statues, claimed in a lawsuit it was tricked into buying the business as the company teetered on the brink of failure.

JSSI Capital Enterprises LLC alleges it was defrauded into buying Franklin Mint in 2009 because the sellers made "material misrepresentation and omissions," according to a complaint filed Dec. 27 in State Supreme Court in New York.

Your honor, my client was sitting at home watching the late, late show when this advertisement was broadcast. "Would you like to own a genuine company? An actual replica of a famous company from 1929! This company was carefully crafted by artisans to look and feel just like the real company. It comes complete with moving doors and windows with an actual spare tire!

If you order now, we'll send you framed stock certificates that you can mount on your walls to impress your friends! You might expect to pay twenty million dollars in stores for a value such as this, but if you order now! We'll send you the company, the stock certificates and the mounting frame for only sixteen million six hundred thousand dollars, sorry no cod's.

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How could this happen? Is there no justice in this world? A nice honest business man who made himself rich by selling Ronald Reagan commemorative coins, NASCAR collectors plates and over sized matchbox cars has been accused of ripping someone off?

"Franklin Mint, of Exton, Pennsylvania, sells coin sets like a U.S. presidential dollar collection for $259.95, models of cars, including a 7.5-inch long Corvette covered in crystals for $1,295, and dolls of famous women like Michelle Obama and Marilyn Monroe, according to its website."

And then your honor, when the UPS man arrived, all I got in the box was list of phone numbers. Phone numbers for a toy company in China, a TV production company and an advertising agency. I said to my wife, "wait a minute, where's my frame and stock certificate?"

Its funny when rich people get cheated, when poor folks get cheated we're told, "Well, its your own fault. You should have read the fine print." When we run to the courthouse  with our grievances its called, a frivolous law suit. This case is unique because a guy who made his living for years selling junk to an unsuspecting public has now sold junk to an unsuspecting corporation. What did the corporation plan to do with the Franklin mint? Did they plan on changing its business model? Or did they plan to continue to sell junk to an unsuspecting public?

I suppose there is some Latin legal maxim, ripping off someone while selling them a rip off. Like selling defective burglar tools, or a map into a bank vault that has been closed by the FDIC. It just goes to show you how our society is in decline. There was a time in this country when there was honor among thieves, the trade has been over run with amateurs, lawyers and bankers. Until you can't even trust a guy who is selling you a company that routinely misrepresents its own merchandise.

Actually, I'm jealous, I would love to get my hands on this company! I have an idea for a series of collector dolls. A John Boehner collector doll, you hold him up to the light and he tans right before your eyes. A Sarah Palin doll, pull her string and she says a 101 unintelligible things! Then the exclusive, Barack Obama collector doll, you buy him and when you get him home and put him on his pedestal... he turns his back on you!

Then a commemorative tea party set, that comes complete with smoke pellets and mirrors! The genuine porcelain tea pot is riddled with holes so that it won't hold water! Just like the real tea party! Sorry, flags and white sheets not included.

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Or Pedro the Mexican illegal immigrant collector doll, then you can order his wife and children! Collect the whole set, all twelve million of them! A Bristol Palin doll, wind her up...and she can't dance! Press the button on her back and her tummy swells as she says, "guess what Mom!"

Then for those of you who are still upscale, the Goldman Sach's collectors plate. Its twenty four carrot gold with a large hole in the middle so no matter how much money you put on their plate it falls through into someone's waiting hand. Or the Wall street stockbroker collectors doll, squeeze his head and money comes out his..., well, money comes out. Even if money doesn't come out its still fun to squeeze his head.

You can't buy them in stores, so don't order now. In fact you can't buy them anywhere. If you're looking for NASCAR collector plates or gold plated wooden nickels from South Africa, I'm sure those are still available. The court will soon decide the case of Rip off Inc. vs. Rip off LLC.  It is sad to see it all come to this, lawyers and courthouses for selling junk. The owner of the Franklin mint obviously had talent. He squandered them selling overpriced Matchbox cars, any one with that much talent selling crap to the public should have gone into politics or perhaps he draws the line at small rip offs?

Well, you just can't make this stuff up! Well, some of it you can.

 

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I who am I? Born at the pinnacle of American prosperity to parents raised during the last great depression. I was the youngest child of the youngest children born almost between the generations and that in fact clouds and obscures who it is that I (more...)
 

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