The pain in Spain falls on I who explain
To friends in Madrid the cause of Trump's reign,
This maker of mayhem and lord of the tweet,
Who knows only factoids and talks like the street.
To answer I check the questioner's face,
Note if he's hippy or drinking apace,
Check if he wears an al Qaeda tat,
And that being the case, look 'round for a bat.
First I float out the usual reason:
Clinton was Clinton, the silly preseason,
The lack of some zing from guys on the right,
Who live and die for the perfect sound bite.
I then elaborate and edify all,
On how a president with that kind of gall
Can take the place of Barack Obama,
Who despite defects was no mouth-arama.
'Cause like it or not Trump got helping hands,
From guys who hate rules and wear the top brands,
You see them behind the prez at his desk,
Beaming like moms as he signs a burlesque.
Not a bit did they mind if Trump was a jerk,
As long as he dropped the role of young turk,
On Russia and Is'rael talked the good talk,
Obeyed the gen'rals and walked the right walk.
And now that he does, why, all's fine and dandy,
This Russiagate stuff'll be dealt with quite handy,
Don and Ivanka will this world aright
For those mighty few who fly the same kite.
By now my friends marvel that Yankees can't tell
Theodore R. from a dandruffy swell.
So I ask a question with somewhat more zip:
How is it Europe still follows this ship?
Trump himself with rare illumination,
Pondered the point of Nato duration.
But why does Europe, with armies or duty,
Continue to kiss the U.S. patootie?
Nowhere in Europe that I've ever seen,
Does anyone question America's sheen,
Which makes me wonder if political man,
Has any future if he thinks with his can.