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Life Arts

What the Hell Does "Sanctity of Marriage" Mean?

By       Message John Blumenthal       (Page 1 of 3 pages)     Permalink

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Karl Rove - who likes to invoke the phrase "sanctity of marriage" as a reason to prevent gays from marrying - recently got divorced for the second time. The question is: Where exactly was the sanctity in his marriages?

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In fact, the term "sanctity of marriage" is off-limits for anyone who's gotten divorced, because when people get married they take "sacred" marriage vows. One of those vows is, "until death do you part," not "I'm tired of you, goodbye."

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Obviously, "sanctity of marriage" is a meaningless phrase concocted by Rove-like bigots and religious fanatics who are terrified that gay marriage will lead to moral decay, since it says so in the Bible, which it doesn't. Men, they say, are supposed to marry women. It's God's will.

Fact is, in Biblical times, if there weren't any women handy at the oasis, you flirted with the closest attractive goat, or the nearest cute guy in a robe. It's lonely in the desert, and you can't have a very satisfying sexual experience with sand. Also, there's nothing in the Bible about coveting thy neighbor's goat.

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John Blumenthal has been a professional comedy writer for 25 years. A former associate editor and columnist at Playboy Magazine (following a short stint at Esquire), he's written 8 books and 2 produced movies. His films include "Short Time," (major (more...)
 

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