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Life Arts    H4'ed 4/5/19

What Happened When Joe Biden Wanted to Sit down at the Democratic Table

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Possible 2020 candidate Joe Biden says he 'may be a gaffe machine' but he's 'the most qualified person' to be president
Possible 2020 candidate Joe Biden says he 'may be a gaffe machine' but he's 'the most qualified person' to be president
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That noise that all heard was the squawk of despair,
When Biden crouched low to sit on his chair,
At table with Bernie and many a rose,
And down fell Joe to sore awkward pose,
For his butt found itself of chair full bereft,
Both table and chairs having moved to the left.
So Biden got up with his usual grin
And said, "That's a classic political sin.
You should always look down 'fore taking a chair,
'Specially with wise-guys like ol' Bernie there,
Who think they've given a permanent shove,
To our party's core and the nation thereof."
And striking bold stance leaning on the chair's back,
He said, "I'll just stand, since you all show a lack
Of true recognition of what I stand for:
Civil rights, health care, and concern for the poor,
All that I fought for when you guys were teenies,
The prob' being then we had Bush and his meanies."
Bernie said, "Hold on, Joe, you're stretching too far,
You're selling a rusted bald-tire used car.
Sure, you have some qualities worthy of Dems,
But of them your leftist cred much haws and hems.
Miss America might for dog-catcher run,
But lose on a platform of fashion and fun.
"So if you're planning the Centrist Waddle,
With HRC as your political model,
Remember her message did squat on the stump,
And got mashed to fodder by sleaze-master Trump,
So this time around we do poor versus rich:
That's the best way to leave Don in the ditch."
But Joe said "No, there's room for us all,"
And gave the table a mighty great haul
Back to the center and admonished the rest
To support his nom' after he's won the quest,
Which he might do when it's all said and done,
And means that Trump has re-election near won.

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"A Legacy of Chains and Other Stories" is Philip Kraske's lastest book. It can be found at his website:

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