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OpEdNews Op Eds    H4'ed 1/15/22

Welcoming (Sort of) 2022

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Message BK Faunce

What's that? It's 2022? Already? Well, grit your teeth and call it smiling!

It must be time for one of the country's most cherished traditions, welcoming in the new year by looking back on all the wonderful things that happened in the old year. Reminiscing and reflecting. What a year! Think of it.

You and your family joined the homeless. You lost your job. You had a job but you couldn't afford to keep it. You went into debt. Your family went into debt. Your car won't start. Your street crumbled. Your playground fell apart. Your tap water turned murky. Your air smelled polluted. Your community tread medieval. You got Covid. Your family got Covid. Your children were forced to attend unsafe schools, where they got Covid. Your neighbors refused to get vaccinated or wear a mask and they got Covid. Some of your neighbors terrorized the Capitol. They said god told them to do it.

All those memories! A lifetime of memories! Go ahead. There's no shame. Let the tears fall freely.

But there's a lot to look forward to as well, and we're only in the second week. "So far, so good," the man cried when he reached the 13th floor, after having jumped off a 14 floor building. Some notable examples:

"Let Jesus Play": Novak Djokovic, arguably the greatest tennis player in the history of the sport, has gotten himself into a sticky situation. It concerns the Austrian Open and a deadly virus. Djokovic wants to play but he's refused to get vaccinated. He applied for a medical exemption. It was granted initially, then rescinded, and for a time Novak ended up in quarantine. His father said he was being treated like "Jesus." He recently won his appeal but he could still be deported for violating quarantine and lying on his visa application. Like a true Nazarene, he blamed others for the discrepancies. Should Australian officials allow someone to play in the Open who tried to cheat, lied about it and then threw a tantrum when he got caught? Absolutely! Stop crucifying the man! Let Jesus play!

"Justice, UK Style": it appears having a sexual pervert in the family isn't quite enough. British royals just announced they'd knighted former Prime Minister, Tony Blair, W's poodle & a documented war criminal, on 31 December 2021. He'll officially join the ranks in June. Shocked, you say? The coward who lied his country into war? The soul-less villain who trades in children's blood? Who profits off death? Elevated into the vacuous midst of royalty? Please. Curb thy disbelief. It's what they do. It's what they've always done. Baron Charles Trevelyan oversaw a famine (1846-51) that starved a million Irish to death, a war crime he pawned as a "lesson" from god. Such a kidder. He was knighted by the crown and lauded by British elites as an example of what could be accomplished through thrift and industry. The royals also honored well-known racist and unapologetic war criminal Winston Churchill, the guy who fire-bombed Dresden as part of an Allied campaign to "cause terror." Celebrated. Feted. Showered with gifts and awards for crimes and crimes and still more crimes. Welcome to the club, Tony.

"The law's some tricky sh*t." Leave it to Thelma to speak the simple, honest, straight-forward truth. A year ago this month, three days before the bloody insurrection, Donald Trump placed a call to Georgia's top election official, Brad Raffensperger. The president ranted about election fraud (he was lying) and bullied Raffensperger to "find" the exact number of votes Trump needed to hold onto power. Was it obstruction? Sure it was. Was it illegal? You betcha'. According to Georgia law, it's a felony to "solicit, request, command, importune or otherwise attempt to cause another person to engage in election fraud." Clearly, Trump broke the law. So why hasn't he been prosecuted? You or I would have been prosecuted. Anybody else would have been charged and arrested months ago. But, like Thelma says, the law is tricky. There's little doubt it applies to ordinary citizens, the unwashed masses, you and me, the rabble. Evidence is everywhere. As for the rest, it appears to be an experiment in Socratic thinking: "Trump is an elite. The law does not apply to elites. Therefore, the law does not apply to Trump." The logic is inescapable.

"Ukrainium Resurrectium": fascinating, the way the Biden regime is pushing war with Russia through Ukraine. Talk about distractions. Not health care. Not climate change. Not infrastructure. Not employment. Empire building on foreign soil! Ukraine! You remember. It's the country that dared to put together a serious investigation of official corruption, which naturally included Hunter Biden, the corrupt son of the corrupt then-VP. The corrupt VP responded by helping to stage a military coup that overthrew the democratically-elected Ukrainian gov't and put Neo-Nazis in charge. He then publically threatened to withhold funding if the guy investigating his son's crimes, Prosecutor General Viktor Shokin, wasn't sacked. And just like that, Shokin was smeared in US media and given the boot. For his criminal behavior, the corrupt VP was rewarded with the presidency. I mean elected. Hail to the chief.

"Mayor 1%": speaking of rotted fruit, Democratic Party operative Rahm Emmanuel, one of the vilest of the vile during Obama's first term, was recently appointed ambassador to Japan. His performance in both DC and in Chicago was a complete disaster. He called liberal activists "retards." He was nicknamed "mayor 1%" because of his service to the rich and powerful. Worse, he covered up Laquan McDonald's murder until after his re-election and then, when a video of the murder was made public, he got caught lying about it. On the other hand, he did a lot of terrific things for his base, for the important people, the people in control. When those folks say give the ol' rat-bag a sweet gov't sinecure, the ol' rat-bag gets a sweet gov't sinecure. Any questions?

Slight aside: does anyone really need any further proof of systemic political corruption? Nancy Pelosi does insider trading. Kyrsten Sinema does Big Pharma. Chuck Schumer does Wall Street. Joe Manchin does fossil fuels. Obama does drone assassinations. And you thought it was about voting rights and supporting democracy. Silly person.

Step up, step up!

Commit a war crime, earn hard cash! Strafe bomb wedding parties, win a $12 million mansion! Cheat workers, eat expensive ice cream from a $25,000 refrigerator! It's politics for personal gain! Sacred words engraved on a sacred plaque hanging on the sacred walls in the Capitol rotunda: "E pluribus meum."

Stay safe for the new year, fellow travelers. It's going to get bumpy.

Postscript: In an earlier piece ("Internal Exile"), it was argued Prince Andrew would never be forced to testify under oath about his rape of Virginia Giuffre. Not so fast. After Judge Kaplan's decision to allow the case to go forward, it looks like Randy Andy is headed in that very direction. He will either testify or default, which is to say, he will decide not to respond to the legal inquiry. (Violate the law? Surely he'll be extradited to the US to face charges? Like Julian Assange?) Either way he's done, and good riddance. But to hell with privileged villains. It's Virginia Giuffre who deserves our forever thanks. She's the amazing woman who brought this royal rapist to justice. "Nolite te bastardes carborundorum."

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BK Faunce is a retired Associate Professor of English (UMW / UCSC) specializing in British Romantic Literature, Film Theory and Writing. His recent work examines the use of state power and its impact on visual culture.

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