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Vacation You Always Dreamed About

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Message Joel Hirschhorn
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No need to wait if you want to experience total luxury, persistent pampering, marvelous surroundings, the best of food and drink, and a gorgeous tropical beach.  All this and much more await you at the Royal Plantation in Ocho Rios, Jamaica.  After vacationing in Jamaica and other Caribbean islands for some 25 years I recently discovered this opulent yet affordable dreams-come-true all-inclusive paradise.

Never have I experienced so many “bests” on a vacation.  The Royal Plantation is so incredibly designed, maintained and managed that within a short time you know you have made one of the best decisions in your life.  It starts with a private car taking you from the airport to the property.  Less than an hour and a half ride that lets you appreciate the many wondrous scenes of Jamaican landscapes and sea sides, as well as several towns and, of course, countless colorful local residents.

Within minutes of arriving at the striking main building you will start to experience the beginning of what surely is the very best service of any hotel in the world.  While sipping champagne you will be efficiently registered and told about the many amenities that await you.  All the furnishings in the public spaces and suites are of the highest caliber: real class, beauty and quality.  The panoramic views of the ocean and the many tropical gardens take your breath away.  Odds are good that even in your first minutes you may see one or more of the many peacocks that live and breed on the property.  I spent considerable time during my week there watching the strange and intriguing behaviors of the peacocks, and fed them when they wandered down to the beach.

This small, boutique hotel with just over 70 exquisite ocean view suites has a large number of staff to pamper guests – to cater to their every need and desire everywhere on the property.  These workers are the best trained I have ever seen, and I have stayed at a number of five star hotels around the world. 

Ah, that beach!  Beach resorts have been a priority of mine for many decades.  The RP beach is the best maintained and serviced of any I have ever experienced.  While on the beach there will always be staff (beach butlers) more than eager to please you with drinks, rose water sprays, fresh fruit and more.  This is a beach to discover total relaxation with the ocean in front and lush tropical gardens behind you.  A bar and beach grill are just steps away.  Every lunch I had by the beach was marvelous; I became addicted to the coconut shrimps and grilled fresh fish.  And appreciate this: All the furniture at the beach and elsewhere outside is high quality word – NO PLASTIC!

Ah, the food at the RP!  It is like having access for all meals at the world’s topmost restaurants, especially at the French restaurant where I ate the best beef, lamb and seafood dishes I have ever had; the two chocolate desserts are to die for.  The food is absolutely fantastic.  There is also a full array of room service treats available.  But what is even more impressive is that you can make all kinds of special requests and mine were always welcomed and fully satisfied.  Several times I asked for things not on the menu and they were happily provided, even if it meant the staff going to one of the other restaurants.

Ah, the atmosphere of genuine friendliness!  You will surely have opportunities to have enjoyable conversations with the top hotel managers as well as workers performing the full range of jobs at the property.  I had the most rewarding conversations with the general manager, food and beverage manager, executive chef, sales manager, head gardener, and countless bartenders, wait staff, beach staff, and grounds workers.  There is an openness at the RP that makes you feel like you are deeply appreciated as a guest.  You really will be treated like royalty.  Yet you will not experience anything snobby or pretentious in this opulent resort.

Here are a few more memorable features: The hot tubs are not only beautifully designed but their setting looking out over the ocean is without parallel.  The piano players during dinner in the French restaurant and during the afternoon tea on the terrace, and the local Jamaican band by the beach at lunch, make you feel that you really are staying at a place fit for the superrich.  The bathroom amenities are the best I have ever had.  The in-room bar is stocked with a wonderful array of soft and hard drinks.  The nightly entertainment is both sensuous and soothing.  All kinds of water sports are available; the glass bottom boat ride is a must.  There is a well-equipped fitness center.  At the full-service spa I had the best massage ever.  Because the hotel is small you never have to deal with crowds or delays; you personally are always a number one priority of all the staff.  You will feel special!  Especially when you get a free foot massage on the beach in a special enclosure.

At the end of my stay I booked my next vacation at the RP, which is a testimonial to how great this hotel resort is.  And my evaluation is shared by many others, explaining why this resort has won many awards and is rated as one of the top ten all-inclusive resorts by the highly regarded and useful Trip Advisor website community.  Do yourself a big favor, treat yourself, go to the Royal Plantation and soak up the exotic elegance and endless pleasures.  Indulge yourself.  Get to know the weird but beautiful peacocks.  After all, to miss out on paradise would be such a mistake.

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Joel S. Hirschhorn is the author of Pandemic Blunder: Fauci and Public Health Blocked Early Home COVID Treatment, Delusional Democracy - Fixing the Republic Without Overthrowing the Government and several other books, as well as hundreds of (more...)

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